12 no bullsh*t tips to deal with someone losing feelings for you

Worried that the man you love has changed and doesn’t care about you anymore?

The voice in your head and your heart wonders whether your partner lost interest in you already.

Feeling and knowing that the person you’re in a relationship with doesn’t feel the same way anymore is a tough pill to swallow.

It’s difficult, stressful, and confusing – and you’re wondering what you can do to save the relationship and bring his interest back.

Let me share with you how.

What to do when your partner no longer has feelings for you? 12 ways to deal with it

Go over this practical list if you can sense that the man you’re dating or your partner is losing interest.

Remember relationships go through different phases. Not feeling loved anymore can hurt, but this doesn’t necessarily mean it’s time for a breakup.

And better see this as a time to reflect on whether your relationship is working or where it’s headed.

1) Give him breathing space

Even a healthy relationship needs personal space to give room for growth. See this as a time so he can figure out what he wants and needs.

Though being ghosted feels awful, sometimes it’s not always personal.

If this person stopped calling or texting, it could be that he prefers communicating with you in person. Or maybe he’s dealing with something else.

While you want to get closer to your partner, it might push him further.

If you feel that this person needs space as things are going on with him or your relationship, give him that.

This doesn’t mean giving up or letting go.  Just make sure to tell your partner you’re giving him space.

And avoid doing these:

  • Never text or call him all the time
  • Don’t keep questioning him what’s going on

When he’s ready, he’ll start reaching out. But when he doesn’t and decides to leave, remind yourself to keep going.

2) Take stock of yourself and your relationship

Now that you’ve given your partner the space he needs, do the same thing.

Use this opportunity to honestly go over yourself and your relationship. It’s time to focus on you.

Maybe you’ve expected too much from him and the relationship you had? Or maybe your partner isn’t the person you thought they were.

There are instances where you’ll realize that this change of heart wasn’t as sudden as you thought it was.

But if your partner isn’t interested in the relationship anymore, remember that feelings change, and you can’t force someone to feel the same towards you.

And instead of worrying that he doesn’t feel something for you anymore, find out what makes you happy.

3) Want advice specific to your situation?

While this article explores the main tips to deal with someone losing feelings for you, it can be helpful to speak to a relationship coach about your situation.

With a professional relationship coach, you can get advice specific to your life and your experiences…

Relationship Hero is a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations, like falling out of love. They’re a very popular resource for people facing this sort of challenge.

How do I know?

Well, I reached out to them a few months ago when I was going through a tough patch in my own relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.

I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.

In just a few minutes, you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.

Click here to get started.

4) Respect your partner’s needs and feelings

When your partner is losing interest, never act aloof, cold, or mirror his behaviors.

I know. It’s difficult to keep an open mind when someone’s drifting away.

But if you can do something, be more understanding. People love to be treated special and be appreciated, so pay more attention to their needs.

When you’ve known each other long enough, you’ll likely feel if something serious is going on. If you sense that something is bothering him, keep making him safe.

Support him, and hopefully, things will get back soon.

Make it known that you genuinely want to be there for him.

But when you do this, remember to keep your own needs in mind too.

Sometimes all we have to do is understand that life and feelings can take an unexpected turn.

5) Communicate with full honesty

Healthy relationships are strengthened by communication.

This is the best way to deal with the disconnection between you and your partner.

Maybe your partner doesn’t even realize that you’re feeling that way or that he’s taking you for granted.

When you fear what might be, just take a deep breath. By talking honestly, you’ll get to clear the air, know what’s going on, and see where your relationship is heading.

As Lisa Concepcion, certified professional love life coach and founder of LoveQuest Coaching, shared on the Insider website,

“Communicate on this immediately and not from a place of fear and judgment but curiosity, compassion, and understanding. There could be something else unrelated going on.”

In some instances, the reason could have nothing to do with you. Or maybe, it could be deeper than you think.

Remember to stay calm throughout.

If you feel hurt at some point, avoid getting aggressive and any form of confrontations. This can only make matters worse.

Communicating openly is connecting and acknowledging that something’s wrong, so you can both work on rekindling the relationship.

6) Bring the spark back

There are times when the reason why someone loses interest is when the relationship has turned to be boring.

While it’s normal for relationships to fall on the side and be complacent, you can try to shake things a bit.

Get him interested again and surprise him if you can.

See, even if you’re together for a long time means that you have to stop dating one another.

It’s time to pay more attention to the relationship to rekindle the deep feelings you used to share.

If you’re willing to reignite the spark in your relationship, put time and effort into making it work.

Do these things in hopes to strengthen the connection that you still have.

  • Surprise him with an exciting date night
  • Compliment him when he least expects it
  • Fulfill his sexual desires
  • Recreate your wonderful times and experiences
  • Do things that you have to enjoy doing together

But if he remains indifferent to your efforts, it could be a sign that your relationship is in deep trouble.

7) Spark his inner hero

If he’s losing feelings for you, it could be that he doesn’t feel like the hero he wants to be.

I learned about this from the hero instinct. Coined by relationship expert James Bauer, this revolutionary concept is about three main drivers all men have, deeply ingrained in their DNA.

This is something most women don’t know about.

But once triggered, these drivers make men into the heroes of their own lives. They feel better, love harder, and commit stronger when they find someone who knows how to trigger this.

So if he’s pulling away, it could be a case that he needs his inner-hero awakened. 

Now, you may be wondering why it’s called “the hero instinct”? Do guys really need to feel like superheroes to commit to a woman?

Not at all. Forget about Marvel. You won’t need to play the damsel locked in the tower to make him see you as the one.

The truth is, it comes at no cost or sacrifice to you. With only a few small changes in how you approach him, you’ll tap into a part of him no woman has tapped into before.

The easiest way to do this is by checking out James Bauer’s excellent free video here. He shares some easy tips to get you started, such as sending him a 12 word text that will trigger his hero instinct right away.

All of that and more is included in this informative free video, so make sure to check it out if you want to make him yours for good.

Because that’s the beauty of the hero instinct.

It’s only a matter of knowing the right things to say to make him realize that he wants you and only you.

Here’s a link to the free video again.

8) Take a step back to move forward

Instead of telling your partner what he’s missing, it’s best to show them to him.

So go out there and make him see you like the amazing woman he fell in love with. Make him remember how he used to notice your wonderful personality.

If he used to love seeing you in that red dress, wear it again on your date.

Maybe you can also recreate your earlier dates or get back to the “honeymoon” phase in your relationship.

Pay attention to how he reacts.

The trick here is to remind your partner what he loves most about you from the start.

Doing this can help reignite the intense feelings and attraction that was once there.

Work on creating an environment so you can reconnect by doing something you used to do.

Sometimes even just watching a movie, giving each other a massage, or going on a road trip can work wonders.

9) Go on a temporary relationship break

Locking yourself into a relationship just because you’re scared of losing the other person isn’t worth it.

A relationship where feelings are drifting away won’t be fair to you or your partner.

When you’ve shared your feelings with your partner and did what you have to do, but his feelings remain lost, it’s time to have a break.

Let this period be a way for you to work on yourself before jumping into something more serious.

See this as a way to look at the relationship from a distance.

This “time-out” works only when you’ve agreed to heal damaged wounds and agreed to meet specific goals.

But even a temporary break can be painful so you must know how to cope with it.

Here’s what to remember:

  • Avoid grieving your relationship as it’s not over yet
  • Avoid making him realize that you depend on him
  • Never chase him or be available when he asks you too
  • Don’t make your life miserable
  • Attend to your needs without the guilt

A temporary timeout doesn’t spell the end of your relationship.

Sometimes having a break is the best solution to save a relationship, but in most cases, this could lead to a breakup.

And this happens when one partner realizes that the relationship isn’t worth saving anymore.

10) Know that his feelings aren’t a reflection of your value

This is the most important thing you have to know right now.

Your partner losing feelings and interests in you doesn’t reflect your worthiness.

Just because he’s drifting away or doesn’t want to pursue the relationship anymore means that you’re not good enough.

This doesn’t also mean that you’re not interesting. Know that you are.

You don’t have to change yourself. And that’s okay.

It’s hurtful as you’ve invested your time, energy, and feelings into your relationship.

This is what being with someone is about.

Having a relationship has nothing to do with one’s worthiness, only about their compatibility.

It’s just that things have changed or maybe he wants something else. Or maybe, it’s clear that he’s not the right man for you.

11) Give yourself time and work on your well-being

Some women who enter a relationship don’t realize that they’re making their partners the center of their world. When they do this, everything else falls on the side.

In the course of a relationship, you might feel like you’ve invested too much that you’ve forgotten yourself already.

The worst thing that you can do when your partner loses his feelings for you is to shut down.

Don’t stop caring for your life, your dreams, and your passions just because your partner is drifting away.

Alright, it’s perfectly normal to feel sad, disappointed, hurt – and feel all those emotions. But never allow any of those emotions to control you.

And yes, it’s okay to cry to lessen the hurt. But don’t let this stop you from living your best life.

Just do anything that will make you happy.

  • Pamper yourself or get a new haircut
  • Sign-up for yoga, painting, or dance class
  • Enjoy time with your family and friends
  • Re-engage with your old hobbies
  • Try out things you’ve never done before

Just focus on being the best version of yourself. Because your life and your happiness matter a lot.

So get out there and keep doing your thing instead of sulking all day.

12) Know your worth

Remember what an amazing woman you are – with or without – your partner in your life.

Know that your self-worth doesn’t depend on someone else.

Instead of focusing on your partner and his dwindling feelings, focus on how you feel about yourself.

According to Daniella Bloom, divorce success coach and dating expert,

“When you start to show up differently for yourself, either your partner will stop and take favorable notice, or, someone else who is far better suited for you, will instead.”

See yourself as a wonderful woman and a great catch.

If your partner doesn’t see the amazing woman that you are or doesn’t feel like he’s the luckiest man in the world to have you, then he’s not the right one for you.

You’re far better with someone who appreciates you and all the great qualities that you have, right?

The right man who will value you is out there – though you have to value yourself first.

Because after all, you’re worthy of being chased and loved.

You can cope with this

Realizing that your partner is losing (or has already lost) his feelings for you hurts more than words can say.

Remember that you can’t force someone to get those lost feelings back.

The psychology behind why men pull away

If you feel like you’ve tried everything and your man is still pulling away, it’s probably because his fears of commitment are so deep-rooted in his subconscious, even he’s not aware of them. 

And unfortunately, unless you can get inside his mind and understand how the male psyche works, nothing you do will make him see you as “the one”. 

That’s where we come in.

We’ve created the ultimate free quiz based on Sigmund Freud’s revolutionary theories, so you can finally understand what’s holding your man back. 

No more trying to be the perfect woman. No more nights wondering how to repair the relationship. 

With just a few questions, you’ll know exactly why he’s pulling away, and most importantly, what you can do to avoid losing him for good. 

Take our great new quiz here.

Does it make sense to get him and your relationship back?

If you and your partner want to revive the relationship and have a strong reason for staying together, then, by all means, work on it.

And when you’re meant to be together, he’ll find his way back to you.

Though there are instances where relationships can be fixed especially if the loss of interest is a misunderstanding or personal issue, it’s not that common.

At some point, you have to accept this reality and move on.

Czaroma Roman

Czaroma is a content strategist and copywriter with a purposeful mindset. She finds fulfillment in crafting content for entrepreneurs and life coaches. In a place of love and growth, she's raising a tribe of three with her husband - and writes to inspire people to create impactful relationships.

Connect with her on LinkedIn and Instagram.

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