Lachlan Brown
Ending relationships and cutting people out of your life is tough. It takes time, patience and emotional strength.
But what’s even tougher, and less understood, is how to break a soul tie.
It’s not the same as just saying goodbye to someone: there’s a lot more to it.
Here’s a guide.
17 effective ways to break a soul tie (complete list)
First off: before we get to breaking it, what’s a soul tie?
The short and sweet version is this: a soul tie is a deep emotional and personal connection you feel with another person that completely transcends the physical and reaches to the level of your (and their) inner essence.
Soul ties are powerful as hell. But they’re not always good or helpful. And when they become codependent or toxic, you may need to take out the scissors…
With that in mind:
1) Take a long hard look…
Take a long hard look at the soul tie in question.
Is it a net positive in your life? What about in the life of your soul partner?
When I say this, I’m not asking whether it’s all smiles and giggles. Nothing real in life is ever just rainbows and sunshine.
We all experience gray clouds in our deep relationships and it’s part of the give and take of how we learn and grow.
What I’m asking is whether you feel that you and your soulmate would be, on sum, better off parting ways?
Would this give you more space to truly become yourselves or would it set you back?
Not all soul ties are a factor for the good, in fact some can tie you down in very disempowering and dark ways.
It all depends on looking at this soul tie as objectively as possible and seeing how you feel about it.
If this soul tie is making you embrace your lower instincts and the
“Examples of a toxic soul tie relationship include feeling that person completes you so much that you can’t function without being near them, thus building a negative attachment.”
2) What kind of soul tie do you have?
Next up, take a look at what variety of soul tie you have.
A common misunderstanding is that a soul tie is always romantic or that it comes hand-in-hand with smoldering physical passion and intellectual enchantment.
This is not always the case.
You may have a soul tie with an old friend, or with your neighbor who has become like a best friend.
You may have a soul tie with your ex husband, or with your current husband.
You may have a soul tie with someone from your religious community who you can’t get out of your mind but wouldn’t kiss in a million years.
Soul ties come in many different shapes and sizes, so take a look at what kind of soul tie you have and what constitutes it.
The fact is, soul ties aren’t always romantic and come in many different forms:
“With that in mind, professional intuitive and author of Self-Care for Empaths Tanya Carroll Richardson says soul ties can also refer to the broad term describing any kind of soul connection between two people…
…And they don’t have to be romantic relationships, she adds. You may even quickly realize this person isn’t an uplifting presence in your life.”
Like I said before, no person has an obligation to be some constant “upper” in your life, nor you in theirs…
But you also have no obligation to stay with someone who is crowding awful situations, people and energies into your life.
This can really bring you down and sabotage you in so many ways you’re barely even aware of. It can also serve as a default green light for you to flood their life with your own complaints and problems as well.
This is when cutting a soul tie can be a well advised course of action.
3) Break the chains
Breaking the chains of a soul tie is not as complicated as it sounds. The following is a short and simple guide to 10 effective ways from A to J, to break a soul tie along with more observations about how to make it last.
4) Meditate it away
Meditation is a good way to perform a ritual to cut a soul tie.
Ask a higher power or the universe to end this connection for the good of all involved and as your conscious decision.
“You can also try doing the work on your own by doing a ritual that consists of meditating and asking whatever higher power you believe in … that the negative connection is broken.”
5) Burn sage and cleanse the energy
Burning sage is a long-held tradition in many indigenous and aboriginal cultures.
Doing this while stating aloud your intention for the soul tie to be severed between you and the (named individual) is a powerful and effective way to end this bond.
You are clearing away the old and ushering in the new.
6) Sever the soul ties energetically
Another of the most effectives ways to break a soul tie is to do so energetically.
This can take various forms, including chanting, holding crystals, a shamanic retreat, breathwork or even fasting and prayer.
In these times you internally and externally repeat your desire to liberate yourself from this soul tie and move on.
You put forth the intention and you commit to it, allowing yourself to move on from its grip.
7) Bring in a medium or mystic
Enlisting the help of a medium or mystic can actually be one of the most effective ways to break a soul tie.
These professionals understand how to communicate and work in the spirit world in a way that may seem “far out” to many of us or even unbelievable.
However, it’s very much real.
As long as you choose carefully you can ensure you get the right medium or mystic to severe the soul tie the right way and make the separation lasting.
8) Let nature aid the process
One of the most effective ways to break a soul tie is to head out into Mother Nature and let her nurturing arms aid us in the process of letting go.
Shout your desire for a soul tie end into a rushing waterfall, or into the grand canopy of the trees in the forest.
Whisper it to a flower, or speak it to a flying bird.
Watch nature’s endless dance unfold as you also feel new life unfolding within you and the possibility of new connections.
9) Remove the reminders
Another of the crucial things you need to do to cut a soul tie is remove the reminders.
Your soulmate’s watch or shaving cream…
Her favorite picture hanging on the wall…
The tacky fridge magnet souvenir gift from Greece you just never could quite bring yourself to throw away…
It will have to go. Soul ties thrive on nostalgia and cling on wherever they can.
10) Move locations
Another of the important and effective ways to break a soul tie is to move locations.
Sometimes staying in the same home, the same neighborhood or the same locales can allow a soul tie to stick around.
Shake it up and don’t be afraid to change. This allows the soul tie to truly deserve and new opportunities and experiences to arise.
11) Change your routines
Pursuant to the last point, it can be important to change your routines if you really want to break a soul tie.
Try to visit new places, meet new people, experience the same routines in different ways if necessary!
Listen to exciting music you’ve never tried before. Let the soul tie stay in the past.
12) Put it in a letter
There’s something about writing down your thoughts and deepest emotions that clarifies and crystallizes them in so many ways.
The same goes pertaining to the most effective ways to break a soul tie:
Write it in a letter. Put down all your thoughts and emotions. Explain why you are breaking this soul tie.
Then postmark it to your soulmate and send it flying into the wind, or into the ocean, or throw it out your car window.
13) Visualize the tie breaking
Visualization has become a bit of a cliche, but it can indeed be powerful.
Try visualization for tuning into the most effective ways to break a soul tie:
Visualize this tie like a silver cord binding you together that you respectfully and firmly unwrap.
The tie is breaking: the tie has broken.
14) Wrong time, wrong place…
There’s a saying that you’ll sometimes hear: right person wrong time…
What I believe most truly is that the right person always makes it the right time.
That may make me a romantic, but it’s been my experience and that of those closest to me.
When the right person comes along and loves comes calling you will be knocked off your feet in ways you never expected.
If a soul tie is keeping you strangled in the undergrowth, it’s the wrong person and it will always be the wrong time.
You may be tempted to say next year, next time, when I feel better or so on…
But trust that feeling deep in your gut that’s telling you it’s time to let go.
That feeling is sometimes a sad and quiet clarion call that’s steering you right where you need to be.
Which in this situation may well be a future without this soul tie in your life any longer.
It’s sad, but many changes which ultimately turn out positive are indeed sad when they happen.
15) What is your future after them?
As you’re looking for effective ways to break a soul tie, it’s important not to only think of the short-term future.
What is your future after them?
Breaking a toxic soul tie is one thing. It can be a lifesaver.
But once you have your life and your life force back, what do you do next, put your feet up and have a pink lemonade on the porch?
Actually that sounds not bad.
But the point is that having only a negative goal (to not have this person in your life) won’t replace the necessity of having a positive goal (what you do want in your life).
So think hard about what you want to do with this new energetic space that’s going to open up as this soul tie dissolves…
There will be all sorts of new energy and love you have to give.
This is your time ahead of time to start choosing when and where to give it in a way that respects you and your values to the utmost.
16) Call in the pros
One of the most effective ways to break a soul tie is to consult an expert who understands how these things work and how powerful and enduring they can be.
If your soul tie is a romantic relationship it can be especially hard to let go.
Even once you break up, their soul imprint lingers on you…
You could be apart five years and the mere thought of their eyes makes you feel like your entire body and soul is on fire.
I get it, I really do.
While this article explores the most effective ways to part ways with a soulmate, it can be helpful to speak to a relationship coach about your situation.
With a professional relationship coach, you can get advice specific to your life and your experiences…
Relationship Hero is a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations, like having to say goodbye to someone you feel is literally a part of yourself.
They’re a very popular resource for people facing this sort of challenge.
How do I know?
Well, I reached out to them a few months ago when I was going through saying goodbye to my own soul tie as I mentioned.
After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
17) Doing what’s best for all involved
Perhaps the hardest thing about severing a soul tie is picturing the devastation and isolation of the other person involved once you cut ties.
What will they do next and how can they survive?
The thing about this is that in many cases breaking a soul tie is what’s best for all involved.
Despite the spiritually elevated energy and significance, a soul tie is sadly subject to all the same kind of problems that ordinary friendships and relationships are subject to…
Neediness…
Jealousy…
Codependency…
Cutting loose someone who may be dependent on you as well in an unhealthy way can be a blessing in disguise for them.
This newfound devastation could be the beginning of a new reality and better beginning for them too.
All too often we cling to a deep soul tie as a way to fix our life for us and make everything OK.
Having that safety blanket taken away is our worst nightmare.
And it can become our greatest blessing.
Free your soul from toxic bonds
Freeing your soul from toxic bonds is no small feat.
Especially when it’s somebody very close to you or even a soul tie with a close family member that you thought you would literally die without.
Well, you’re still standing, and you’re still true to yourself and ready to engage with the world on meaningful terms.
Nothing is over or hopeless by any means, in fact it’s only just begun.
If you have done this, you can breathe a giant sigh of relief.
You are free now from this burdensome bond which has kept you down for so long.
You can get on with your life and approach its challenges from your own terms instead of with a spiritual weight around your ankles.
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