Kiran Athar
During childhood, we’re always told to “be nice” to others.
But as we get older, life gets in the way. Jobs are stressful, and relationships are complicated.
It’s easy to fall into the trap of only focusing on ourselves.
If this sounds like you, don’t worry. It’s never too late to change and be more considerate of the people around you!
In this article, I’m going to share 15 simple tips to be a nicer person every day, starting with the most important:
1) Start by being nice to yourself
If you want to be a nicer person, start with yourself.
I know it might sound too simple or obvious, but often we’re our own harshest critics.
Negative thoughts and self-doubt can easily take over, so start getting conscious of how you talk to yourself…
The truth is, the nicer you are to yourself, the nicer you’ll be to others!
2) Practice empathy
Another way to be a nicer person every day is to practice empathy.
This is when you’re able to put yourself in the shoes of others and truly understand how they feel.
When you practice empathy, not only will you deepen your connection with other people but you’ll show them that you care.
To improve your empathy levels, try:
- Active listening (which I’ll cover later in this article)
- Asking questions to better understand their feelings/perspective
- Imagining how you’d feel if you were in the same situation
- Avoiding passing judgement
- Offering support or comfort
Ultimately, through showing empathy, you can be a much nicer person to everyone you come across!
3) Take responsibility
If you feel like you’re not a very nice person due to your life experiences, or even missed opportunities, I’d first like to say that I get it. Life isn’t kind.
But, and I say this respectfully, you can’t blame everyone and everything else for your misfortune.
We all make choices, and we need to own those decisions. When you start taking responsibility for yourself and your actions, you allow yourself to learn from your mistakes.
Just by doing this, you can be a nicer person. Once you truly own who you are, you’ll be in a much better position to improve your life and as a result, your personality!
4) Eat and sleep well
And one area you most definitely can take responsibility for is your well-being.
Are you sleeping enough?
Do you feed your body with healthy, nutritious food, rather than chemically filled crap?
You see, if you want to be a nice person, you need to feel good.
No one is happy when they’re tired or feeling sluggish.
Start by sorting out your daily habits such as drinking enough water, getting good sleep, and eating well, and you’ll soon see how much better you feel!
5) Make being nice an intention
Look, being nice doesn’t come naturally to everyone. Some people are actually very kind deep down but have trouble displaying it.
So, if you’re one of those people, why not try making it an intention to be nice?
When you wake up, tell yourself that today is the day you’re going to brighten someone else’s day.
And the best part?
It doesn’t have to be a lot – a smile at the barrister, a wave to a child on the bus, holding the door open for your neighbor.
Whatever it is, think about it beforehand and put it into action. Slowly but surely, by doing this daily, you’ll become a nicer person!
6) Look for opportunities to be kind
And following on from my last point, you could take it to the next level by actively looking for opportunities to be kind.
That might look like this:
- Volunteering at a care home or local animal shelter
- Working with the local community center
- Joining a program to help underprivileged kids
Or it could be as simple as being observant; you notice your neighbor’s lawn is overgrown? Why not do them a favor and trim it down?
The more you perform acts of kindness, the more being nice to people will come naturally!
7) Be open-minded
Another simple way to be a nicer person every day is to keep an open mind…
This means not judging people or dismissing their opinions straight off the bat!
It also means being adaptable; just because your current dentist isn’t available, there’s no need to kick up a fuss. Maybe the other dentist they offer you is even nicer?
You see, when you open your mind, you stop seeing every change as an inconvenience.
And when you adopt that mindset, it makes you a much nicer, easier person to be around!
8) Give people the benefit of the doubt
And in relation to being open-minded, it never hurts to give people the benefit of the doubt.
The truth is, we don’t know what people are going through. The man next to you on the subway might have lost his mother that morning to cancer.
The girl who rudely pushes past you may be in a rush to get home to care for her disabled grandma.
Rather than jumping to conclusions without knowing what people are going through, it’s best to keep an open mind and always be kind.
In doing this, you’ll find that every day you become a nicer, more understanding person.
9) Be a good listener
Now, earlier I mentioned the importance of listening when practicing empathy.
In all honesty, to be a nice person you need to have good listening skills in general. I recommend learning about active listening…here is a brief overview of how to put it into action:
- Give your full attention to whoever is talking to you (turn off distractions like your mobile or the TV)
- Make eye contact while listening to them
- Don’t interrupt them
- Don’t rush to give your opinion until they’ve finished
- Ask plenty of questions
By actively listening to those around you, not only will you show that you truly care, but you’ll be a nicer person for giving them the time and attention they deserve!
10) Let go of anger and resentment
Now, I don’t know your personal circumstances, but most people I’ve met who struggle to be nice usually are holding on to past baggage aka resentment.
Something may have happened in your past which has made you wary of other people. Maybe a bad experience shut you off from the world and now you struggle to be nice.
If so, I’d highly recommend seeking professional help to overcome whatever it is that’s holding you back!
And let me make it clear – there’s no shame in this. We all have things we need to let go of, anger, resentment, old grudges…and until we do, being nice to others takes a back seat!
So, do what you need to do to move on from whatever has hurt you in the past. I guarantee by letting that sh*t go you’ll feel much better and in more of a position to be nicer to others!
11) Be honest with yourself and others
Another simple way to be a nicer person every day is to just be honest.
Rather than agreeing to help someone out in the attempt of being nice, but then letting them down because you’ve got too much on your plate, try being honest from the start.
Learn to say no politely but offer another time when you’re free to help.
And when you’re not feeling well or you’re stressed out, be open about it. No one is going to judge you for it, but it will help them understand why you may sometimes appear “not” nice.
The truth is, no one is nice all the time. We all have moods and emotions that fluctuate.
But by being honest, you’ll free yourself from the guilt and allow others to understand you better.
Just by doing this, you’ll probably feel more relaxed and able to actually be nicer!
12) Increase your patience levels
And as well as being honest, it’s a good idea to review your patience levels too.
I get it – we live in a busy world and people can be frustrating.
With that being said, there’s very little we can do about it!
So, rather than being huffy and annoyed by people around you, why not try understanding them a bit better?
Taking a moment to be empathetic?
Or simply giving them the benefit of the doubt!
Getting good at being patient every day will not only save you a lot of trouble and headache, but it’ll make you a much nicer person in the long run!
13) Practice self-care
Earlier, we spoke about the importance of eating and sleeping well. But I also wanted to mention self-care.
Without it, it’s pretty hard to be a nice person!
So, how can you practice self-care?
- As well as eating and sleeping well.. exercise! This releases endorphins which will boost your mood and make you feel more positive.
- Keep social – spend time with good friends and family.
- Set small goals and achieve them – this sense of accomplishment can do wonders for your self-esteem.
- Do something you enjoy every day.
- Make time to relax…whether it’s running a hot bath once or twice a week or treating yourself to a spa once a month, it’s important to unwind!
The bottom line is:
When you look after yourself, you feel good.
And when you feel good, you’re more likely to be a nicer person to anyone you cross paths with!
14) Smile!
Now, I know you might be thinking that this next suggestion is slightly too simple…
And it is – but it works!
Hear me out:
When you smile, you instantly create a positive environment. People around you relax. You’re giving off “friend vibes” not “enemy vibes”.
But that’s not all…
Just the act of smiling can reduce stress, improve your mood, and lower your heart rate.
You’re effectively tricking your brain into thinking something humorous or good is happening, even if you’re faking the smile.
And as I said above, when you feel good, being a nicer person comes much more naturally!
15) Show appreciation
Finally, if you want to be a nicer person, start showing appreciation every day.
Don’t wait for big things to happen to be happy. Instead, learn to appreciate even the smallest of moments.
It could be your cat rubbing against you, or being able to witness the sunset from your bedroom window.
It could be your favorite song coming on after many years or the yummy food you make for dinner.
Ultimately, this comes down to fostering a positive mindset. Look on the bright side of life instead of focusing on the negatives, and you’ll be a nicer person in no time!
