How long should I wait for him to text me before giving up? 12 tips if he hasn’t responded yet

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It can be exhausting and draining to wait on a guy to text you back.

It’s natural to want the attention of the guy you’re attracted to and it can be difficult to know how long to wait before giving up on him.

If he is interested then he will definitely make time for you, but it is possible that his work could have kept him from texting you back.

So here are 12 tips to know how long is “too little, too late” if he hasn’t replied to your text yet:

1. Be Patient and Give Him at Most a Week to Respond

Patience is key when dealing with a guy who has responded to your text yet.

Even if it seems like he no longer wants anything to do with you and is ghosting you, it might not necessarily be the truth.

He may have gone on a vacation, gone off the grid for a mental health break, or taken time away from their phone to focus on his career.

It can be disheartening to spend hours waiting on a text that doesn’t come but it’s important to remain positive about it.

Chances are either he is busy or maybe holding back for a few days to not seem “desperate”.

In any case, he will text you back the moment he misses your charm and company.

Give him at most a week to reply; if he doesn’t chances are he isn’t interested or invested.

2. Assume the Best, Prepare for the Worst

It’s always important to assess the situation fairly and not panic over your emotions.

It can be hard to be left hanging over a text conversation, but in all fairness, he could have genuinely been busy.

It’s also possible he may have just missed your text during a hectic day.

It’s easy to think of the worst, but it’s best to give him the benefit of the doubt for a while.

Always assume he has the best of intentions but also be prepared for the worst.

You can’t possibly know what he is going through but it isn’t your responsibility to read his mind either.

Stay cheerful and optimistic while giving him a little time to get back to you.

Spend the time you have thinking of the happy moments you spent with him to help stay optimistic.

3. Check Their Pattern of Replying Back to You

If he isn’t replying to your texts, go back through your chats and see if there is a similar pattern of seemingly “disinterested” texts.

Check if they usually reply quickly and haven’t got back to you only for your last text.

It might also be possible that he is late in replying in general and that the amount of time between each text – while significant to you – may just be their normal reply time.

Also see if they text you back and forth when both of you’re online in a deep conversation.

This may be a sign that when he does make time he likes to spend it chatting with you, and hasn’t gotten back to you because something came up.

It may also be a subtle sign that he is starting to lose interest in you.

4. Does He Feel Like Your Hero?

When you’re together, does this protect you? Does he hold your hand when you’re crossing the road? Does he open the door for you and make sure you’re okay?

If he does these things, then it might indicate that he wants to be your provider and protector, which is an excellent sign that he genuinely likes you and he will definitely text you back eventually.

You see, for guys, it’s all about triggering their inner hero.

I learned about this from the hero instinct. Coined by relationship expert James Bauer, this fascinating concept is about what really drives men in relationships, which is ingrained in their DNA.

And it’s something most women don’t know anything about.

Once triggered, these drivers make men into the heroes of their own lives. They feel better, love harder, and commit stronger when they find someone who knows how to trigger it.

Now, you may be wondering why it’s called “the hero instinct”? Do guys really need to feel like superheroes to commit to a woman?

Not at all. Forget about Marvel. You won’t need to play the damsel in distress or buy your man a cape.

The easiest thing to do is to check out James Bauer’s excellent free video here. He shares some easy tips to get you started, such as sending him a 12 word text that will trigger his hero instinct right away.

Because that’s the beauty of the hero instinct.

It’s only a matter of knowing the right things to say to make him realize that he wants you and only you. 

Click here to watch the free video.

5. Reflect on the Quality of Your Conversations

Reply time isn’t the only parameter that can be used as a litmus test for their level of interest in you.

While going through your chat history, check to see the quality of their messages.

Try to see if they have put a lot of thought and effort into their past messages.

Reflect on their wordings and see if you can figure out if they seem interested in you or not.

Even though he may not text you back frequently, the fact that his texts are lengthy, insightful, and keep the discussion going indicates that they enjoy conversing with you.

It’s possible that they were preoccupied and missed your previous message.

Short messages or a lack of engagement in the conversation are indications that they aren’t genuinely invested.

6. Think if Your Text Warranted a Reply

Not every text warrants a reply.

He may have left it on reading because he genuinely believed that was the end of the conversation.

It’s also possible that he didn’t believe the conversation could have become fruitful from there and chose to leave it at that to prevent the enjoyable interaction from turning awkward.

He could have also not felt the need to reply to a text that only confirmed what he already knew or for a text that had very little room for continuation.

Texts like “Hey”, “Seeya”, “Cool”, “Kay”, and the dreaded “mm” are often not gonna get replies.

Rather than spending your time worrying, try to send him another text or think of him smiling at your texts while you wait for him to reply.

7. What Would an Expert Say?

While this article explores how long you should wait for a guy to text you, it can be helpful to speak to a relationship coach about your situation.

With a professional relationship coach, you can get advice specific to your life and your experiences…

Relationship Hero is a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations, like how long you should wait for a guy to text you, and whether or not you have a special connection with him. They’re a very popular resource for people facing this sort of challenge.

How do I know?

Well, I reached out to them a few months ago when I was going through a tough patch in my own relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.

I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.

In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.

Click here to get started.

8. Focus On Yourself and Other People in Your Life

Making your entire social life come to halt as you wait on a text from a single guy isn’t a healthy way to spend your time.

Regardless of whether he is busy, misses the text or is trying to avoid you, you should use the time to focus on yourself as well.

The time you spend away from your phone and with other people in your life can be a huge stress-buster.

Spend some time engaging in a hobby you enjoy, reading a book, or going on a walk without your phone.

Engage in conversation and activities with your family and friends to keep your mind off the person who hasn’t texted you back.

9. Hit Them up to See if You Can Catch Their Attention

There is a time for waiting and then there is a time for action.

If sufficient time has passed and he still hasn’t gotten back to you, you can still give him one more chance before it’s time to give up hope on him.

Send him one more text to spark a conversation and grab his attention.

Refrain from being passive-aggressively mentioning the fact that he didn’t reply back to you, and just shoot him a text about a random topic that he might be interested in

You can ask him how he’s been, what’s new in his life, about something exciting that happened in your life, or even about a movie that he’s been raving about for ages.

Just don’t send a barrage of texts as it may overwhelm him and he may not know how to respond to all of them.

10. Maybe Try Calling Them if They Aren’t Much of a Texter

It is also possible that texting is just not his style and he prefers facetime, in-person conversations or long calls.

It may be worth a shot to give him a call just to hear his voice.

If he sounds genuinely excited to hear your voice, it may be a sign that he is still interested in you.

By asking him how he’s been over the call, you can organically spark a conversation that will capture his attention.

Without getting angry that they haven’t texted you, let them explain what they’ve been doing and how they’re feeling.

It’s a positive indication that they still care and want to keep in touch if they sound sincere and repentant.

On the other hand, if he acts as nothing happened or seems like he hasn’t missed you, then it may be time to close this chapter.

11. Rethink Where You Stand With Them in the Relationship

This is an important part of analyzing the situation after he hasn’t replied to your text in over a week. Think of where you stand with him in the relationship and how much value you have.

Assess if he respects you or if he has drained your self-esteem.

It may be time to cut ties with him and start moving on if you feel like perpetually waiting on him has emotionally exhausted you.

It is also possible that you may have lost feelings that you once had for him entirely during this period.

Think about if you feel connected with him emotionally and whether you have strong feelings for him.

It will be simpler to move on if you acknowledge your differences, aren’t overly drawn to him, and don’t form a close bond.

12. Move On if You Aren’t Valued or Prioritized

This is the moment where you value yourself and decide to move on.

If he can’t prioritize you even after cutting them some slack, then he isn’t worth your time and effort.

You deserve a guy who cherishes every moment he gets to spend with you and is excited to text you.

If he isn’t giving you the time of day, then it is unrealistic to envision a future with him.

There are plenty of other people who would be happy to text you and be with you; they treasure your connection and value your time.

You can take some lessons from the relationship and even use them to better yourself.

You should invest your time in people who want to invest their time in you to find the perfect partner for your love life.

By now you should have a better idea of how long you should wait before giving up on this guy. 

But if you genuinely like this guy and you want to take your connection to the next level, the key now is getting through to your man in a way that empowers both him and you. 

I mentioned the concept of the hero instinct earlier by appealing directly to his primal instincts, you won’t only solve this issue, but you’ll take your relationship further than ever before.

And since this free video reveals exactly how to trigger your man’s hero instinct, you could make this change from as early as today. 

With James Bauer’s incredible concept, he’ll see you as the only woman for him. So if you’re ready to take that plunge,be sure to check out the video now. 

Here’s a link to his excellent free video again. 

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Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder, and editor of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 15 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. Check out my latest book on the Hidden Secrets of Buddhism and How it Saved My Life. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook or Twitter.

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