Tina Fey
Confidence is a funny thing. It can be elusive, hard to define, and even harder to attain. It’s a quality that can be faked, postured, and imitated, but it’s only the truly confident man who can claim it as their own.
When you see someone who exudes confidence, it’s unmistakable – they don’t have to say a word, you just know.
But what is it that sets these men apart? How do they become so self-assured and assuredly themselves?
In this article, we’re going to explore the traits of highly confident men and what you can learn from them.
So if you’re looking to boost your own confidence and become the best version of yourself, read on
1) You Don’t Scare Easily
I’ll clarify this right off the bat: confidence does not equate to or even come close to machismo.
There’s a difference between bluff and true courage, and confident men have courage without all the bluster.
That’s the difference between being scared and refusing to recognize that fear is a natural thing that shouldn’t be ignored.
And while being scared is natural, truly confident men understand that fear is something that should be respected, not something that threatens their identity.
Having the ability to not scare easily is not about being fearless or invincible, but rather having a healthy respect for the things that should inspire fear, while also having the confidence to face them head-on
2) You Can Laugh At Yourself
Laughing at oneself is a sign of true confidence, as it shows a willingness to be vulnerable, acknowledge one’s imperfections, and not take oneself too seriously.
Confident men know that laughter is often the best medicine, and that by being able to laugh at themselves, they can diffuse tension, build connections, and find joy in the ups and downs of life
Anyone who has a complex about being laughed at is likely hiding insecurities of their own.
Not only is this far from the true confidence a man should aspire to have, but it’s a trait that will only spoil the fun for everyone else.
3) You Know How To Compromise
It’s easy trying to get carried away with always getting what you want – but truly confident men know how to compromise, haggle, or just negotiate for a mutually beneficial outcome.
They’re confident that they’ll always come out on top, so why bother trying to press even more advantage than they already have?
Confident men are never greedy because they know their value.
More than that, they know exactly how much value people should give them in return.
Compromise to them is simply a means to an end, and the outcome will always be favorable to them no matter the costs.
4) You’re Seen As The Reliable One
In today’s fast-paced, often-changing, and very shaky culture, a man who has got their act together exudes confidence.
They know they can weather the different storms that life may throw their way, and they can be relied on for anything from a life-changing emergency to simple requests.
If you’ve often been praised for your work ethic, it’s because you have the confidence to back up what you do with consistency.
You have the knowledge to pull off exactly what you say you’re going to commit to doing, and that always gives your actions a certain level of confidence.
5) You’re Often Seen As The Leader
Charisma plays a lot into leadership – not all of it, but a significant reason why people would follow you is that you’re charismatic.
That’s not possible to pull off unless you radiate confidence. Genuinely confident men are usually chosen as leaders, sometimes just based on the charisma that comes with it.
If you often find yourself being one who takes charge of your group (especially if you don’t ask for it), it’s likely because people think you can live up to their trust in making a decision on their behalf.
It’s not always something that you might be looking for, but it’s definitely a privilege that you’ll get.
6) You Often Get Asked For Tips
Sometimes the easiest way to know what you’re like is when other people just tell you, and confidence is certainly something that you’ll get comments on.
If other people tell you that you radiate confidence, there’s a reasonable chance that you should take what they’re saying at face value.
It’s even more obvious when people ask you what’s behind your confidence: after all, imitation is the most sincere form of flattery. In short – if you have it, people will let you know.
7) You’re Not Fazed By Criticism
I’ve seen far too many self-proclaimed confident men lose their marbles over a simple comment, and that’s always a sure sign that their confidence is fake.
Truly confident men don’t mind criticism (genuine or otherwise), since they’re secure enough in themselves to not care about what people think.
That’s not to say that you ignore criticism entirely.
Confidence also means having the wisdom to acknowledge that criticism is always something worth paying attention to since it’s one of the best ways you can improve something about yourself.
As long as it’s valid, a confident man will never be scared of criticism.
8) You Generally Have No Trouble Finding A Date
This might be a little bit of a hot take, but confidence goes a long way in the dating scene.
I’ve met some really confident men who had no trouble getting dates while more conventionally attractive men were left in the dust.
Confidence is attractive, and if you’re actively in the dating scene, it’s certainly something that can land you a date or two.
Why is this the case? Personally, I think it’s because genuinely confident men know that they miss 100% of the shots they don’t take.
They have the confidence to put themselves out there, plus the self-esteem to bounce back if they get turned down.
9) You’re Not Intimidated By Things You Don’t Know
The unknown can bring out the best (or the worst) in many people.
Someone’s reaction to something or a situation that they know nothing about can reveal a lot about their character.
For confident men, the unknown is many things: a challenge, a warning, something that just happens, but never something to be intimidated by.
This really boils down to the confidence that they have from understanding who they are and what they’re capable of.
Someone certain of themselves as a person will always meet the unknown without fearing it since they can trust in themselves to handle whatever comes next.
10) You Don’t Rush Into Things
Time is a luxury that not everyone can afford.
However, one thing that I’ve always noticed – and somewhat envied – in confident men is that they always act like they have all the time in the world to do anything.
This isn’t always the case, as I found out much later. It’s just that confident men have trust in their own time.
That’s why confident men never rush: they know how much time things will take as soon as they’re involved.
They know that rushing in will usually complicate things: so why bother when they know giving a situation a little time will get them better results?
It takes a lot of self-esteem and an accurate understanding of what they’re capable of doing to pull this off, which are traits that you don’t find often.
11) You Don’t Get Tilted When Things Don’t Go Your Way
Routines are something that everyone falls into sooner or later; which is why being upset or tilted about having your routine disrupted isn’t something worth batting an eye about.
What confident men do differently is just take any disruptions like this in stride. In many cases, it’s even something that they might welcome.
I asked someone what makes them so secure about themselves when things go wrong, and the answer was simpler than I thought.
Confident men don’t make a fuss when things don’t go their way because they know that’s not the only way to get what they want.
12) You Don’t Feel Anxious In Social Situations
If nothing else, confidence gives you a much-needed boost during social interactions.
Confident men don’t have to worry about things becoming awkward or trying to keep a conversation interesting because they naturally know how to keep the interest of their company.
It doesn’t matter if it’s an acquaintance or a long-time friend – talking with them is always a good time.
Confident men are also great storytellers, so they’re rarely lacking anything to say during social gatherings.
If people like listening to what you have to say (no matter how boring it may seem) it’s probably because of the confidence they feel from you when you say it.
13) You Have Your Insecure Moments
A truly confident man is confident in all things – even the fact that they’re not always going to be the best person ever all the time.
I’ve found that really confident men think that their confidence comes from accepting their insecurities, not trying to gloss over them with other things.
It’s this acceptance (and the self-worth to not let it get to them) that really makes a confident man who they are.
It takes plenty of courage and self-reflection to admit to your insecurities, and confident men have the confidence to do so without losing sight of who they are.
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