Alexandra Plesa
You’re a smart, ambitious, loving, confident, and independent woman.
Even more important, you know your worth.
So, when it comes to dating, you already have an idea of what to look for in a potential partner.
Buckle up, because I have a few more suggestions for your list.
A high-value woman like you shouldn’t settle for less than a man with these 15 traits.
1) Emotionally available
Does he have difficulties opening up? Is he guarded, avoidant, defensive?
Then he’s not for you.
A high-value woman won’t settle for someone who can’t be there for her when she’s at her most vulnerable.
Additionally, emotionally unavailable men have difficulty sharing their struggles, so you’ll never be able to really know him.
As a result, your connection will be flimsy and superficial.
If you find yourself involved with a partner who can’t deal with emotional intimacy, don’t beat yourself up too much.
They’re good at putting up a charming front at the beginning of a relationship.
However, once you notice that they’re not keen to offer or ask for emotional support, it’s time to bolt.
2) … and physically available
A high-value woman won’t settle for a man who doesn’t make time for her.
Even if he has a demanding job or going through a stressful time, you still have the right to a check-in.
If he ghosts you for days, refuses to make plans to see you in person, or only wants you to hang out with him on his terms, you’re better off alone.
Don’t get me wrong: emergencies happen, and schedules get busy.
But if he’s worth it, he’ll make spending time with you a priority.
(And he’ll make up for it when he can’t.)
3) Respectful
You can tell if a man respects you by assessing his actions, not listening to his words.
A few surefire signs you found a good one:
- He regularly asks for your opinion
- He takes your side in arguments
- He doesn’t second-guess your decisions
- He is upfront about his intentions and doesn’t jerk you around
- He speaks his mind and doesn’t sugarcoat the truth
- He doesn’t try to micromanage your life
If you’re a high-value woman, you will settle for nothing less.
A man who doesn’t respect you isn’t worthy of your trust.
4) Feminist
Look, I’m not saying that the man you’re seeing should be intimately familiar with Gloria Steinem’s work or only watch movies that pass the Bechdel Test.
I’m saying that he should firmly believe that men and women are equals.
You can’t build a successful partnership with someone who thinks you’re beneath him.
Because you’re very much not.
You don’t even have to ask him about his views on the matter. Simply pay attention to how he behaves.
If he’s a feminist, then there’s a good chance that he:
- Admires your ambition and supports your goals
- Cares about your sexual pleasure as much as he cares about his
- Doesn’t make a whole thing about you wanting to pay the bill
- Doesn’t talk down to you
- Respects women in general
As you can see, the bar is pretty low. The partner of a high-value woman should meet it.
5) Proactive
A proactive man doesn’t sit around complaining about his circumstances.
He doesn’t wait for the universe to throw him a bone.
Instead, he takes matters into his own hands.
He knows what he wants from life, and he has a clear plan to get it.
Regardless of what his goals may be, he pursues them diligently.
As a high-value woman, you know that we make our own luck. Your man should know this also.
6) Has integrity
A man with integrity has a clear set of principles and stands by them no matter what.
If he faces a dilemma, he can figure out the right thing to do.
Plus, he knows that doing the right thing can involve sacrifice.
He’s responsible, honest, and he cares about his loved ones.
If he sounds like a catch, it’s because he is.
And you shouldn’t settle for anything less.
7) Accountable
Speaking of responsibility, a high-value woman deserves a man who is accountable for his actions.
He makes mistakes like everyone else, but he owns up to them.
If he makes a dumb decision, he handles the consequences.
A man who is accountable doesn’t make excuses for his behavior or blame his misfortune on the universe. Or, even worse, on you.
As long as the man you’re with recognizes his blunders and sees them as opportunities to grow, you have a better chance of developing a healthy relationship.
8) Self-aware
Would you date a guy who isn’t in touch with his feelings, has no idea what his red flags are, and can’t tell how his actions affect others?
I didn’t think so.
A high-value woman should be with a man who knows who he is, warts and all.
Everyone changes over time, but the fact that he can identify his strengths and vulnerabilities means that he can connect more deeply with others.
On the other hand, a man with low self-consciousness is more prone to impulsive choices and blame-shifting.
In other words, not a good match for you.
9) Strives for better
Since we’re on the topic of growth, a passion for self-development is a crucial trait to look for in a man.
This means that he not only knows where he stands, but he’s also trying to improve.
A growth mindset can take many shapes and forms:
- He is in therapy
- He constantly sets new challenges for himself
- He reads, watches documentaries, or listens to podcasts
- He has good role models
- He doesn’t say no to new experiences
All in all, he wants to become a better version of himself.
Luckily, the current version of him isn’t too shabby, either.
10) Open-minded
A narrow-minded man is stuck in his ways, gets angry when his beliefs are proven wrong, and doesn’t have much empathy for others.
Don’t settle for anyone who fits that description.
High-value women should be with men who are curious about others, welcoming of another point of view, and willing to change their minds.
Otherwise, you risk being stuck in a relationship with a stubborn man you’ll resent sooner rather than later.
11) Takes care of himself
The right man for a high-value woman doesn’t have to be Prince Charming, but he needs to take care of himself.
From his appearance to his health, he tries to put his best foot forward.
He has good hygiene, can feed himself, exercises, knows how to dress, and his home is clean.
These should go without saying, but based on my experience with dating apps, we live in weird times.
A high-value woman doesn’t have time to mother her partner.
She has better things to do.
12) … and he takes care of you
Even high-value women go through difficult times.
When those come by, the man by your side needs to be able to provide support and encouragement.
Look for a man who makes you feel safe and valued.
Who will let you wallow after a crisis, but only for a short time.
Who can lift you up when you feel down.
Anyone who can’t meet these standards isn’t worthwhile.
13) Confident
Dating someone with low self-esteem means spending a lot of time reassuring them.
Before you know it, you’ll start to make yourself smaller just to make him feel good.
Ideally, a high-value woman should be with a man who knows his power but isn’t arrogant.
Who is willing to take risks and go after what he wants.
Your life together will be much more exciting.
14) Keeps his word
High-value women don’t settle for men who blow them off, cancel plans, and break promises.
If your partner says he’ll do something, he must be true to his word.
You have a busy life as it is.
Wondering if he’ll actually do what you ask him isn’t something you need to add to your to-do list.
15) Loyal
Finally, never settle for someone who doesn’t realize just how amazing you are.
If he isn’t willing to commit – or if he made a commitment but still has a wandering eye – he doesn’t deserve to be with you.
You’re not an option. You’re a choice.
Bottom line
As a high-value woman, there’s plenty you bring to the table.
Make sure that the man standing by your side is just as incredible as you are.
