So I know you’re probably thinking…
There’s no way I’ll ever be happy.
And look, I know that feeling.
Seriously, 3 years ago I was a complete mess.
But now? I’m more peaceful and happy than I’ve ever been.
And check this out: In the past 3.5 years I’ve achieved more than ever been able to achieve in my life.
Let me guess though…
You’re still holding onto regrets of the past and you’re worried about what the future will hold.
And as you know, without enjoying the present moment, you can’t be happy.
Seriously, you can’t enjoy actually living when you can’t live presently.
You can’t get rid of anxiety and depression and finally experience some peace.
Genuinely, you can’t enjoy the beauty of life if your mind is focused on the past or the future.
So, what can you do?
Get rid of all the shit.
You see, it’s attachments and negative thoughts that are keeping you from enjoying the present moment.
Relationships that aren’t helpful to you, desiring more money or materials, hoping that eventually things will change…
It’s this kind of thinking that’s stopping you from living the life you want.
So below, I’m going to go over everything you need to get rid of in 2019 so you can finally just live in the present moment and be happy.
Check them out:
1) You Should Wait Until Tomorrow
We all know that at some point life will end, but for some reason we choose to not think about it often. As depressing as the subject is, it’s something that should be regularly considered.
Some of us have had a friend or family member suddenly taken from us without warning. This can really snap you back into the reality that sometimes tomorrow won’t come for all of us.
Because of this, you’ll eventually learn that tomorrow may or may not come and that every moment should be cherished and appreciated.
2) All the Distractions of Life are Worth Your Time
In today’s world, we’re all glued to our phone. Not only is it unhealthy, but we use it as a distraction from the world around us.
Anyone can communicate with you immediately and you have a world of information in the palm of your hand.
But does that all really matter as much as we think? As you get older, you’ll realize that all those missed text messages and social media notifications really didn’t matter. Making actual memories is what mattered most.
3) Staying Busy is Important
It’s good to be busy once in a while. Time goes by faster, our minds are work and our wheels are spinning.
But sometimes it’s important to slow down and relax. All that rushing around and busyness isn’t really all that important. Our lives aren’t infinite and being overwhelmed everyday is no way to live.
4) Faster Is Always Better
When you’re young, at the time it seems better to work quickly and efficiently. When you’re living this way, you’re forgetting to stop and smell the roses. You don’t have to do everything at once. Sometimes it’s best to slow down and just take one thing at a time. When you’re older, you appreciate every moment and what it has to offer.
In our younger years we tend to think that we’re the center of all that exists. We only see things from a certain angle and are only concerned with how that will affect us and only us.
We tend to put ourselves first instead of thinking about how things affect those around us.
Instead of asking “What about me?” start asking “What about you?” In our older years we seem to be more charitable with our time and also more fulfilled.
5) Everyone Else Knows What You Need.
Your voice matters, so why do you listen to everyone else so much? Your life is your own and when you’re young you trust everyone else to know what’s best for you.
This is a good way to start going down the wrong path and farther away from the things you truly want. When you’re older you tend to start listening to that voice in your head and figuring out what it truly is that you want!
6) It’s Okay to Hold Grudges.
This one is a big one. Holding grudges does nothing but hurt the person holding them. Forgiveness allows you to let go of any hurt or lasting pain you might have.
Sure, someone may have wronged you in your life, but that doesn’t mean you should be angry for the rest of time. It’s easier to let go of the past when you’re older and just focus on the good things to come.
7) You Can Change Other People
If you continue to think that you have the power to influence or change other people, you are dead wrong.
Many people waste time and money and energy and resources on those around them trying to make them someone they are not.
If you have ever had a bad boyfriend or neurotic girlfriend and you tried to change them, you know it is impossible.
But we don’t learn from those kinds of mistakes. If you want to live a better life, accept people for who they are, or move on.
8) You Are The Victim
If you like to wallow in your sorrows and draw attention to yourself because of the things that have happened in the past, then you are never going to grow into the person you are meant to become.
Playing the victim creates a sense of drama in our lives that we think is necessary, but the truth is that while bad things happen, what we think about them is on us.
We can’t control everything, but we can always control how we react to situations.
9) The Grass is Always Greener on the Other Side
If you live in a constant state of wishing for the future, your life is going to be over before you know it.
Rather than worry about how green the grass is on the other side of the fence, tend to your own grass once in a while and see how your life starts to change.
10) Putting Expectations on Others
If you have expectations of people, they will let you down. While this is not always true, it can be the biggest source of frustration for people, especially where family is concerned.
We expect family to help us and be there for us, but when they let us down, it can take a long time to get over it.
Rather than set yourself up for disappointment, stop putting expectations on those around you.
11) You Need Someone To Complete Your Life
If you think your life is sad and terrible because you don’t have a significant other, think again.
There are many great things about you and your life that deserve your attention. So what if you don’t have a partner?
What can you do to make your life better than it was yesterday? How is sharing your life with someone going to make it any better?
12) You Care What People Think
If you spend time worrying about what people think, you’ll never get anything done. Most people are so busy worrying about what others think of them; they don’t even have time to worry about you.
Do what you want and need to do and the rest will fall into place.
13) You Are Unprepared for the Future
If you live in constant fear of what life is going to throw at you, you’ll never live your life to its fullest potential.
If you feel unprepared for the future, start working through some things to get ready for it, but don’t forget to enjoy the here and now.
14) Money Will Make You Happy
Sure, money can buy you a lot of things, but it won’t make you happy. If you spend your life chasing after money, you’ll end up a rich old person with a lot of regrets.
Look for meaning in your life in other places and find ways to measure your success in ways that have nothing to do with money. You’ll be happier for it.
15) Your Past Determines Your Future
Don’t make the mistake of thinking you need to be the person you were yesterday.
Life changes and evolves all the time, and you have the privilege to become whoever you want to be.
16) You Don’t Need to Change
If you think that you are perfect just the way you are, that’s great. But there are probably areas of your life that could use a tune-up.
If you thought that you’ve done all you want to do and accomplished all you want to accomplish, then set some new goals.
Life is best lived when we are growing and learning. Staying still doesn’t give us any pleasure.
17) You Are Always Right
If you need to be right all the time, you can be. But you won’t have many friends or family members that want to be around you.
It’s okay to be wrong, and in fact, if you are always right, how can you learn anything new?
Consider hearing others out when they talk or ask questions to understand the other side of the story when one is presented to you.
It makes life more interesting than walking around thinking you know everything.
18) Dwelling on the past and worrying about the future
This one takes huge mental effort, but it’s important to realize that the present moment is the only thing that exists.
Whenever I noticed myself dwelling on the past, I anchored my mind to something that was happening right now, such as my breathing.
Whenever I was looking to the future in an anxious way, I did the same thing. Eventually it became more natural to fully live in the present.
19) Trying to live up to people’s expectations
It’s important to have your own standards to hold yourself by. For example, I always strive to try my best, help others when I can and hold my word.
But besides that, I can’t do anything else. And worrying about what other people think of you won’t help anything.
20) Comparing yourself to others
Again, this really doesn’t serve any purpose. If you’re trying your best and sticking to your own values, then there’s nothing else you can do.
And anyway, how could you possibly compare? We’re all unique with incredibly different circumstances.
21) Constantly complaining
Let’s be honest, nobody likes a complainer. So don’t be one!
But once you make this a goal, you will begin to notice that you do complain. So my strategy to stop myself was to give a dollar to anyone I was complaining to.
Nothing stops a habit like losing money!
22) Being overly self-critical
Just like above, if you’re trying your best and sticking to your values then you don’t need to criticize yourself. All it does is reduce your self-confidence. Be proud of who you are and how far you’ve come.
23) Trying to be perfect
This is a huge one that I’m sure many of you can relate to. Perfection can be a big cause of depression and anxiety. But no one will ever be perfect. And trying to be perfect will mean that you you’ll be afraid of trying anything new.
Remember, flaws are what make us human!
24) Holding grudges
No one is responsible for my life but me. And why would you want to hold that negative energy inside you, anyway?
25) Trying to avoid mistakes
Mistakes are scary, especially when you’re trying to be perfect. But mistakes and failures are actually a beautiful thing. They allow you to learn and grow. Remove mistakes and failures from your vocabulary and replace them with lessons.
A quick message from Lachlan Brown, the founder of Hack Spirit
In 2018, the third year of Hack Spirit, I poured thousands of hours and considerable resources into creating these articles. It's a labor of love and remains free thanks to your patronage. If you found any value in these articles, please consider supporting what I do with a donation. Your support is what helps me to continue creating more Hack Spirits articles. To make a donation, click the "donate" button below and choose between a single donation or monthly.
Check out Hack Spirit's eBook: How to be Your Own Life Coach: 10 Essential Steps to Creating a Life You Love. Perfect for setting new year goals and actually achieving them!
- Learn the 10 crucial steps to creating a life you love
- Practical techniques and exercises throughout to work out who you are, where you are and what you want to achieve in life
- Affirmations, quotes and motivational techniques to keep you going...even through tough times
- Practical case studies showing what works and what doesn’t