Our beliefs have tremendous power over us. They rule our lives, whether we realize it or not.
Most of the time, we don’t consider how our thoughts impact our daily lives or those around us for that matter.
Humans are pretty self-absorbed, but now and then we realize that our thoughts have the power to change our lives.
Sometimes, this change is good, and sometimes this change is bad.
If you are on a journey toward making your life better, here are 11 toxic thoughts most people think are normal you need to eliminate from your life in order to start living the life you really want and deserve.
Not only will getting rid of them improve your life, but you’ll be a better person for those around you as well.
1) You Can Change Other People
If you continue to think that you have the power to influence or change other people, you are dead wrong.
Many people waste time and money and energy and resources on those around them trying to make them someone they are not.
If you have ever had a bad boyfriend or neurotic girlfriend and you tried to change them, you know it is impossible.
But we don’t learn from those kinds of mistakes. If you want to live a better life, accept people for who they are, or move on.
2) You Are The Victim
If you like to wallow in your sorrows and draw attention to yourself because of the things that have happened in the past, then you are never going to grow into the person you are meant to become.
Playing the victim creates a sense of drama in our lives that we think is necessary, but the truth is that while bad things happen, what we think about them is on us.
We can’t control everything, but we can always control how we react to situations.
3) The Grass is Always Greener on the Other Side
If you live in a constant state of wishing for the future, your life is going to be over before you know it.
Rather than worry about how green the grass is on the other side of the fence, tend to your own grass once in a while and see how your life starts to change.
4) Putting Expectations on Others
If you have expectations of people, they will let you down. While this is not always true, it can be the biggest source of frustration for people, especially where family is concerned.
We expect family to help us and be there for us, but when they let us down, it can take a long time to get over it.
Rather than set yourself up for disappointment, stop putting expectations on those around you.
5) You Need Someone To Complete Your Life
If you think your life is sad and terrible because you don’t have a significant other, think again.
There are many great things about you and your life that deserve your attention. So what if you don’t have a partner?
What can you do to make your life better than it was yesterday? How is sharing your life with someone going to make it any better?
(If you’re looking for a structured, easy-to-follow framework to help you find your purpose in life and achieve your goals, check our eBook on how to be your own life coach here).
6) You Care What People Think
If you spend time worrying about what people think, you’ll never get anything done. Most people are so busy worrying about what others think of them; they don’t even have time to worry about you.
Do what you want and need to do and the rest will fall into place.
7) You Are Unprepared for the Future
If you live in constant fear of what life is going to throw at you, you’ll never live your life to its fullest potential.
If you feel unprepared for the future, start working through some things to get ready for it, but don’t forget to enjoy the here and now.
8) Money Will Make You Happy
Sure, money can buy you a lot of things, but it won’t make you happy. If you spend your life chasing after money, you’ll end up a rich old person with a lot of regrets.
Look for meaning in your life in other places and find ways to measure your success in ways that have nothing to do with money. You’ll be happier for it.
9) Your Past Determines Your Future
Don’t make the mistake of thinking you need to be the person you were yesterday.
Life changes and evolves all the time, and you have the privilege to become whoever you want to be.
(To learn techniques to stop focusing on the past and live more in the present moment, check out Hack Spirit’s most popular eBook on the art of mindfulness here)
10) You Don’t Need to Change
If you think that you are perfect just the way you are, that’s great. But there are probably areas of your life that could use a tune-up.
If you thought that you’ve done all you want to do and accomplished all you want to accomplish, then set some new goals.
Life is best lived when we are growing and learning. Staying still doesn’t give us any pleasure.
11) You Are Always Right
If you need to be right all the time, you can be. But you won’t have many friends or family members that want to be around you.
It’s okay to be wrong, and in fact, if you are always right, how can you learn anything new? Consider hearing others out when they talk or ask questions to understand the other side of the story when one is presented to you.
It makes life more interesting than walking around thinking you know everything.
Lost Your Sense of Purpose?
In this age of information overload and pressure to meet others’ expectations, many struggle to connect with their core purpose and values. It’s easy to lose your inner compass.
Jeanette Brown created this free values discovery PDF to help clarify your deepest motivations and beliefs. As an experienced life coach and self-improvement teacher, Jeanette guides people through major transitions by realigning them with their principles.
Her uniquely insightful values exercises will illuminate what inspires you, what you stand for, and how you aim to operate. This serves as a refreshing filter to tune out societal noise so you can make choices rooted in what matters most to you.
With your values clearly anchored, you’ll gain direction, motivation and the compass to navigate decisions from your best self – rather than fleeting emotion or outside influences.
Stop drifting without purpose. Rediscover what makes you come alive with Jeanette Brown’s values clarity guide.
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