Paul Brian
Being a dependable person is something you prove through your actions.
It’s all about consistency and sticking to your word through thick and thin.
Here are the top commitments that you should never break if you want to be seen as a reliable and trustworthy individual.
1) I’ll be here for you
When you promise someone that you’ll support them and be there for them down the road, do your best to never break it.
Life has precious few people who can say this sort of thing to us and we know with certainty that they mean it.
These are the uncles and friends, the exes and colleagues who we can call up when we’re in a bad situation and know they’ll actually answer.
If you promise someone you’ll be there for them, do your absolute best to follow through on it if and when they do need you.
Which brings me to the next point…
2) I promise to help you
If you promise to help someone, do your best to follow through on it.
The nature of the help you promise can vary a lot here.
You may promise to help a friend get a job or to move closer to your ex-wife to be around more and assist your kids who are struggling in school.
You may promise to help your sister study for a subject she finds very confusing in college, or to do a landscaping job for your parents as part of your rent payments for staying at their house for the summer.
Whatever it is, try to follow through with it.
If you promise to help out, do your best to come through on it.
You’ll respect yourself a lot more and others will as well.
3) I vow to be faithful
When you make a promise not to cheat, you’d better watch your six to ensure it doesn’t happen.
Not only is cheating a shameful thing to do, it’s also a surefire way to lose so much respect for yourself and spiral downward into worse and worse behavior.
If you’re in a relationship or married and you’ve promised to be faithful, you owe it to your partner to do just that.
If you don’t think you can or you aren’t satisfied, then you may choose to begin exploring non-monogamy with your partner or terminating the relationship instead of betraying the trust of someone you care for.
Cheating is not a road you want to go down.
4) I’ll pay you back
If you borrow money, pay it back.
It’s as simple as that.
When you make a commitment to give back money to somebody, do your damndest to make it happen.
Emergencies happen and there really are times that this may not be possible right away or at the date when you promised to return funds.
But if you borrow or take money (or anything) from someone and promise to return it, do everything in your power to keep that promise.
It will do your friendships and your whole life a world of good.
5) I’ll support you financially
If you offer to give someone money or support them financially, try your best to keep this promise.
Not doing so can come across as manipulative or flaky, and neither of those are traits you want to be associated with or remembered for.
When people are desperate for money they can make you feel very pressured…
It’s easy to make promises you can’t really keep in times like that, however.
That’s why it’s best to under-promise and over-deliver whenever possible in such situations, rather than promising a loan or a financial boost to somebody and then not coming through on it.
6) I won’t hurt you
Far too many people make this promise to assure a would-be lover or romantic partner that they are a person who will always care for them to the utmost.
In most cases, it’s a lie.
Let’s be honest:
You can’t predict the future and promising never to hurt someone is at least partly outside your control.
If you get married and later contract a terminal disease, it’s going to hurt your partner.
If you end up intervening with a partner who’s become mentally ill and it upsets them enormously, that’s also going to hurt them.
This statement is well meant, but it’s very hard to keep. Do your best to make it more specific by saying “I’ll do everything in my power to never hurt you.”
7) I promise to protect you
This is a very powerful promise and can happen in many different ways.
You may be promising to always protect your little brother or to always protect your wife.
Whichever way it happens, doing your best to keep this promise is very important.
When you say you’ll look after someone and try your best to keep them safe, try to make sure you stick to that.
If you’re geographically far away or faced with other challenges, do your best to still check in and see if this person needs anything.
8) I promise to cure you
Vowing a health cure is an intense thing to do.
If you’re a doctor or a friend or other practitioner promising to get someone better, ensure that you intend fully to do so and have the actual means to do so.
Making a false or inaccurate promise of recovery to somebody who’s struggling is surprisingly easy to do.
We all hate to see somebody hurting and suffering, particularly somebody we care about, and in the heat of the moment it’s easy to say this without being sure how it’ll happen.
Make sure that if you make a promise of medical support or solutions you really have the way to make it happen and do your best to ensure improvement.
It’s natural to want to give a shot of hope to those we care about, but it’s only worthwhile if it’s backed up by real potential.
9) I’ll always care about you
This is the type of promise that definitely hurts when it’s not kept.
If you promise to always care about someone, you’d better definitely mean it, at least at the time you make the promise.
To the best of your ability you want to be sure that this is how you feel and how you will feel down the road.
This can be hard to do.
But if you feel sure that you will always care about someone, even someone you’ve parted ways with, then feel free to say this.
This relates strongly to the final promise you should only make if you really mean it…
10) I will love you forever
Saying I love you is a huge step.
Saying I will love you forever is cosmic, binding, sacred.
Hearing somebody tell you that they’ll always love you brings a rush of euphoria and strong emotion.
That’s why it’s only the kind of thing you should say when you really are sure that this is somebody you’ll never fall out of love with.
Far too often it’s said in the heat of the moment as well, leading to heartbreak down the road when feelings change.
If you say this you’d better mean it with every molecule of your being, because it’s a very intense and meaningful thing to say.
What about when you can’t help but break a promise?
There’s always an exception to the rule, right?
If you run into an emergency and you can’t help but break a promise, do your best to apologize to everybody it impacts and explain as fully as you can.
If at all possible, try to make up for the promise you had to break or complete it at a later time.
There are emergencies and unforeseen circumstances that come up, but the key is being forthright about it and trying your best to still make up for it.
