7 things about life only overthinkers will understand, according to psychology

For as long as I can remember, my mind has been a bustling hub of thoughts and ideas, relentlessly picking apart every situation, decision, and interaction. At times, it feels like I’m hosting a never-ending debate club in my own head.

Hello there. I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder of Hack Spirit and a self-proclaimed psychology enthusiast. If you’re anything like me—an overthinker, then you know exactly what I’m talking about.

Over the years, I’ve come to understand that my constant overthinking isn’t necessarily a curse. In fact, according to psychology, it allows us unique insights into life that others might miss.

I’ve decided to share these insights with you in this article, and I hope that my experiences and findings can help fellow overthinkers feel less alone and more understood.

Let’s dive in.

1) The never-ending game of “what if?”

One thing that we overthinkers understand better than most is the endless cycle of “what if?” scenarios that can play out in our minds.

This tendency to dwell on possibilities—no matter how unlikely they may be—is a characteristic trait of overthinkers. It’s like our minds are constantly playing a never-ending game of chess, always trying to anticipate and plan for every possible move.

While it can be exhausting, I’ve found that this “what if?” mentality can also be a blessing in disguise. It means we’re often prepared for any situation, having already run through hundreds of potential outcomes in our heads.

I’ve learned to manage this by channeling my overthinking into problem-solving and planning. Instead of dwelling on the negatives, I focus on finding solutions and making contingency plans.

This not only helps to quell the anxiety that often accompanies overthinking but also turns a potential weakness into a strength.

2) The constant quest for perfection

As an overthinker, I’ve always strived for perfection. Whether it was an article for Hack Spirit, a presentation at a conference, or even just a casual conversation, I found myself agonizing over every detail.

According to psychology, this pursuit of perfection is something many overthinkers tend to grapple with. We’re constantly evaluating and re-evaluating our actions, always hunting for the perfect word, the perfect decision, the perfect moment.

Renowned psychologist Dr. Brené Brown once said:

“Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving to be your best. Perfectionism is the belief that if we live perfect, look perfect, and act perfect, we can minimize or avoid the pain of blame, judgment, and shame.”

This quote resonated deeply with me. I realized that my constant overthinking was driven by a fear of being judged or making mistakes.

Once I acknowledged this, I began to work on accepting imperfections—both in myself and in my work. I learned that it’s okay to make mistakes, to be human.

This shift in perspective didn’t happen overnight, but it’s been a game-changer in managing my overthinking and finding peace with my perfectly imperfect self.

3) The art of over-analyzing

I can’t tell you how many nights I’ve spent dissecting conversations, actions, or decisions, searching for hidden meanings that probably don’t even exist.

Psychology suggests that overthinkers have a knack for reading between the lines, often to our own detriment. We’re natural detectives, always looking for clues and patterns, even when there may be none.

For instance, I remember a time when a friend cancelled plans with me at the last minute. Rather than simply accepting their explanation, my mind went into overdrive. I analyzed every word of their message, questioned our last few interactions, and convinced myself they were upset with me.

After a sleepless night and an honest conversation the next day, I realized I had blown the situation out of proportion. My friend had simply been unwell and needed rest.

This experience taught me a valuable lesson: not everything requires deep analysis. Sometimes, things are just as they appear on the surface.

4) The paradox of choice

As an overthinker, I’ve often found myself paralyzed by decision-making. The more options I have, the harder it seems to make a choice.

Psychology supports this experience. A study by Columbia University found that when people were given more options, they were less likely to make a choice, and if they did, they were often less satisfied with their decision. This phenomenon is known as the “paradox of choice“.

I recall a time when I was trying to choose a new laptop. There were so many options—different brands, features, prices, reviews—that my overthinking mind went into overdrive. I spent weeks researching and comparing, but the more information I gathered, the more confused I became.

In the end, I felt so overwhelmed that I put off buying a new laptop for months.

This experience taught me the importance of simplifying choices. Now, when faced with a decision, I try to narrow down my options to a manageable number and make my decision based on my most important needs and wants.

5) The empathy overload

Empathy is a beautiful trait, but as an overthinker, I’ve found that it can also be overwhelming at times. We tend to not only overthink our own lives but also the lives of those around us.

It’s like we have an antenna that’s constantly tuned in to others’ emotions and problems. We feel deeply for them and often spend hours thinking about how they might be feeling or what they might be going through.

I remember a time when a colleague at work was going through a tough personal situation. I found myself constantly thinking about her, wondering how she was coping, and imagining how I would feel in her shoes.

While empathy is a wonderful quality that allows us to connect deeply with others, it’s important to remember to take care of our own mental health as well.

Now, when I find myself getting overwhelmed by empathy, I take a moment to ground myself and focus on my own feelings and needs. It’s not about being selfish, but about maintaining a balance.

6) The fear of making mistakes

As an overthinker, the fear of making mistakes has often held me back. I’ve spent countless hours trying to plan every detail of my actions to avoid any potential pitfalls.

This fear isn’t just about not wanting to fail, but also about the aftermath of failure—the self-blame, regret, and the mental replay of what went wrong.

Famous psychologist Albert Ellis once said, “The art of love is largely the art of persistence.” I believe this applies not just to love, but to all aspects of life. It’s about persisting despite failures and mistakes.

I recall a time when I was hesitant to launch a new feature on Hack Spirit. I was afraid it wouldn’t be well-received and that I would disappoint our readers. But then I remembered Ellis’ words and decided to take the leap anyway.

And guess what? The feature turned out to be a hit. This experience taught me that making mistakes is an inevitable part of life and that it’s okay to take risks.

7) The advantage of overthinking

Now, this may seem counterintuitive, especially given the struggles we’ve discussed so far. But hear me out: Overthinking, in moderation, can actually be a strength.

As overthinkers, we have a unique ability to analyze situations deeply, consider different perspectives, and anticipate potential outcomes. This can make us great problem solvers, planners, and decision-makers.

I’ve found this to be true in running Hack Spirit. My tendency to overthink has often helped me identify potential issues before they arise, come up with innovative solutions, and make well-thought-out decisions.

So while overthinking can be exhausting and stressful, it also has its perks. The key is learning how to manage it effectively.

Here’s a practical tip: try setting aside a specific “thinking time” each day. Use this time to let your mind do its thing—analyze, plan, worry—without any restraint. Once the time is up, though, commit to letting go of those thoughts and focusing on the present.

This practice can help you harness the power of your overthinking without letting it control your life.

Conclusion

Being an overthinker can certainly be challenging, but as we’ve seen, it also offers unique perspectives and advantages. It’s all about learning to manage our overthinking effectively so that it serves us rather than hinders us.

My advice? Embrace your overthinking, but don’t let it control you. Set boundaries for your thoughts, channel your overthinking into problem-solving and planning, and remember to take care of yourself too.

Most importantly, be patient with yourself. Change takes time, but with persistence and self-compassion, you can learn to transform your overthinking from a burden into a strength.

Remember, our minds are powerful tools. Let’s use them to our advantage.