Minh Tran
Life has a funny way of throwing curveballs at us.
Sometimes, we’re prepared to knock them out of the park.
Other times, the best course of action is to simply step aside and let the ball pass.
According to psychology, there are certain scenarios where walking away isn’t just the best thing to do—it’s the only thing to do.
It’s not about admitting defeat or avoiding responsibility.
It’s about recognizing when a situation is no longer serving your mental wellbeing or personal growth.
This isn’t about running away from your problems, but learning when to disengage for the sake of your peace and growth.
Let’s dive in.
1) When the relationship drains your energy
We’ve all been in those relationships that feel like they’re sucking the life out of us.
Whether it’s a romantic partner, a friend, or even a family member, these toxic relationships can be incredibly draining.
Carl Jung, a renowned Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst, once said, “The shoe that fits one person pinches another; there is no recipe for living that suits all cases.”
In other words, just because a relationship works for some people doesn’t mean it will work for you.
And there’s no shame in walking away from a relationship that is causing you more harm than good.
Jung’s quote rings true here: there’s no one-size-fits-all solution to life’s problems.
If a relationship is causing you constant stress and anxiety, it’s time to consider whether it’s worth it.
Sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is to acknowledge the damage being done and choose to walk away for your own mental and emotional wellbeing.
2) When the job is no longer fulfilling
I remember being stuck in a job that felt soul-crushing.
Day in and day out, I would drag myself to work, count the hours until I could leave, and then come home feeling drained and unfulfilled.
It wasn’t always like that. Once upon a time, I was excited about the work I was doing.
But as time went on, that passion faded, and I found myself stuck in a cycle of stress and dissatisfaction.
Famed psychologist Abraham Maslow once said, “What a man can be, he must be.”
This quote speaks volumes about the importance of self-actualization and finding purpose in our lives.
In my case, staying in that job was holding me back from being who I could be.
The day I handed in my resignation letter was one of the scariest—and most liberating—moments of my life.
It wasn’t easy to walk away. But looking back now, it was one of the best decisions I ever made for my personal growth and mental health.
3) When you’re living for others’ expectations
Have you ever found yourself trying to live up to someone else’s expectations?
Whether it’s your parents, friends, or society in general, it can be easy to lose yourself in the pursuit of their approval.
I’ve been there. I’ve worn masks and played roles, all to fit into a mold that wasn’t truly me. It was exhausting and unfulfilling.
The eminent psychologist Carl Rogers once said, “The only person who is educated is the one who has learned how to learn and change.”
This quote struck a chord with me. It made me realize that I was not learning or changing—I was simply conforming.
Choosing to walk away from living for others’ approval was a tough decision.
It meant confronting some painful truths and potentially disappointing people I cared about.
But in the end, it was worth it. I learned that embracing who I am and living my truth is far more satisfying than playing a part for others.
4) When you’re caught in a cycle of negativity
Negativity can be a vicious cycle.
You start off with one negative thought, and before you know it, you’re spiraling down a rabbit hole of pessimism and self-doubt.
Negative emotions can create a ‘negative lens’ through which we view the world.
This means that when we’re feeling down, we’re more likely to see things in a negative light, leading to more negative thoughts and feelings.
I’ve been caught in this cycle more times than I can count. It’s like being stuck in a loop, with negativity feeding on itself.
Walking away from this cycle is challenging. It’s not about ignoring your feelings or pretending everything is fine.
It’s about recognizing the pattern and choosing to break free from it.
By consciously choosing to shift your focus towards positive thoughts and actions, you can start to break the cycle of negativity and create a healthier mental space for yourself.
5) When you’re holding onto past mistakes
We’ve all made mistakes. Big ones, small ones, ones that still haunt us years later.
I’ve been there, replaying past mistakes over and over in my mind, letting them define me.
But here’s the thing about mistakes: they’re a part of life. They’re how we learn and grow.
One of my favorite quotes is from psychologist and Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl who said, “When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”
When I came across this quote, it resonated deeply with me. It reminded me that holding onto past mistakes doesn’t change what happened—it only holds me back from moving forward.
Choosing to let go of past mistakes isn’t about forgetting or denying them.
It’s about accepting them, learning from them, and ultimately, freeing yourself from their hold over you.
It’s about choosing to walk away from the past and move towards a better future.
6) When you’re always chasing perfection
Perfection is a tricky beast. On one hand, aiming for excellence can drive us to do our best.
On the other, the relentless pursuit of perfection can leave us feeling perpetually unsatisfied and inadequate.
Famed psychologist Albert Ellis once said, “The art of love is largely the art of persistence.”
While Ellis was referring to relationships, I believe this quote also applies to our relationship with ourselves.
Perfection is an impossible standard. We’re human beings, not machines—we’re meant to be flawed and imperfect.
I’ve spent years chasing perfection, and all it led to was constant self-criticism and a feeling of never being good enough.
The day I decided to walk away from perfection was the day I started to truly accept and love myself—flaws and all.
It’s counterintuitive, but sometimes, letting go of your quest for perfection can lead to a happier, more fulfilling life.
7) When you’re neglecting self-care
We often forget to take care of ourselves in the hustle and bustle of life.
But self-neglect can lead to burnout and mental health issues.
Psychologist Abraham Maslow once said, “It is not normal to know what we want. It is a rare and difficult psychological achievement.”
Understanding what you need for self-care and giving yourself permission to meet those needs is a vital part of maintaining mental health.
If you find yourself constantly putting others before yourself, it might be time to step back and prioritize self-care.
Sometimes, the best move is to walk away from the noise and take a moment for yourself.
Final thoughts
Life is a journey of twists and turns, ups and downs.
Along the way, we encounter various scenarios that challenge us, push us out of our comfort zone, and ultimately help us grow.
Walking away isn’t always easy. It’s often accompanied by feelings of fear, guilt, or even failure.
But remember, choosing to walk away isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a sign of strength.
It’s about recognizing when a situation or a relationship is no longer serving you. It’s about prioritizing your mental health and wellbeing over everything else.
The next time you find yourself in one of these scenarios, take a moment to reflect.
Ask yourself, “Is this serving me?” If the answer is no, then perhaps it’s time to walk away.
Because at the end of the day, the most important relationship you have is with yourself.
And sometimes, walking away is the best thing you can do for you.
