Eliza Hartley
When someone becomes more stubborn with age, you know they’re becoming set in their ways. When they become more difficult, you know they’re resisting change.
Ah, the simplicities of human behavior.
But hold on, it’s not all that simple. The human psyche is a labyrinth of complexities that requires extra effort to delve deeper into.
However, some men make it a tad easier for us. Why? Because as they grow older and more stubborn, they often exhibit these eight specific habits.
This is the crux of our discussion today on Hack Spirit; delving into the depths of human behavior, specifically those men who seem to get more obstinate with time.
Let’s explore these habits and perhaps gain a better understanding of their transformation, shall we?
1) They resist change
Change is as inevitable as it is unpredictable.
It sweeps in, shifts our perspective, and forces us to adapt. For most, this adaptation is just a part of life’s journey.
However, as some men age, they find this constant flux more challenging to accept. They become the embodiment of the old saying “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks”.
This resistance to change isn’t just about refusing to use the latest smartphone or grumbling about new-fangled technology. It’s deeper.
It’s a stubborn refusal to alter long-held beliefs, habits, and attitudes, even when these are no longer beneficial or relevant.
The result? They come across as more stubborn and difficult. But in reality, they’re just struggling against the tide of change, clinging on to the familiarity of their ways.
This resistance often manifests as one of the key habits in men who become more obstinate with time.
Fascinating, isn’t it?
2) Their need for control intensifies
Control is a big word, isn’t it? It can signify power, stability, and predictability, but it can also mean rigidity, dominance, and inflexibility.
As some men grow older, their need for control seems to escalate.
Let me share a personal example.
My father has always been a man of routine. Morning walks at 6 am sharp, breakfast at 8 am, and so on. However, as he’s grown older, this routine has become more rigid.
Any deviation – the newspaper arriving late or his favorite show being rescheduled – throws him off balance.
He becomes irritable, stubborn even. And it’s not just about the routine. It’s about control – his control over his life and environment.
This intensified need for control is another habit that men who become more stubborn with age often exhibit.
It’s a fascinating journey into the human mind, isn’t it?
3) They become more opinionated
As men age, they’ve seen and experienced a lot. These experiences shape their views, beliefs, and opinions. And often, these opinions become more firm and pronounced over time.
Men over the age of 50 tend to hold more extreme political views than their younger counterparts.
This isn’t limited to politics, though. Men who become more stubborn with age often become more opinionated about everything – from the best way to cook a steak to the proper way to raise children.
These firmly held opinions can make them seem difficult in conversation, especially when they’re not open to differing viewpoints.
It’s as if their world of experiences has somehow cemented their beliefs, making them resistant to any challenge or change in perspective.
4) They become more self-focused
Being self-focused isn’t always a negative trait. It’s about knowing oneself, understanding one’s needs, and setting boundaries.
However, as some men grow older, their focus on the self can become a bit too intense.
You’ll notice that their conversations often revolve around their experiences, their achievements, and their viewpoints.
It’s as if they’re inside a bubble of their own making, and anything outside of it is not as important or relevant.
This self-focused behavior can come off as stubborn and difficult to others. Especially when it feels like they’re not really listening or considering your input.
But remember, it’s often less about being difficult and more about asserting their identity in a world that’s continually changing around them.
5) They often avoid vulnerability
Vulnerability is a tricky thing, isn’t it? It exposes us, makes us feel raw and open to criticism. I’ve noticed that as some men age, they try their best to avoid this feeling of vulnerability.
I once had a conversation with my uncle, an otherwise jovial man in his 70s, about his health problems.
The moment the conversation veered towards anything that made him seem weak or vulnerable, he’d change the subject or brush it off with humour.
This avoidance of vulnerability can sometimes make them seem stubborn and difficult.
They’re putting up walls, not because they want to be hard to deal with, but because they’re protecting themselves.
It’s a defense mechanism, and understanding this can help us be more patient and empathetic towards them.
6) They seek solitude more frequently
We often associate stubbornness and difficulty with conflict and confrontation. However, an interesting habit of older, more stubborn men is their increased desire for solitude.
As these men age, they seem to retreat into themselves more frequently. They enjoy their own company, cherishing the quiet moments of reflection or the simple pleasure of a solitary walk.
At first glance, this might seem contradictory. How can someone difficult and stubborn prefer solitude?
But it’s not about avoiding people or conflicts. It’s about finding comfort and peace in their own space, away from the constant pressures to adapt or change.
So, if you notice an older man in your life seeking solitude more often, don’t jump to conclusions. It might just be his way of navigating the complexities of aging in his own unique way.
7) They start to value their legacy
As we age, our perspective towards life often changes.
We start to think about the legacy we’re leaving behind, the mark we’ve made in the world. This seems to be particularly true for men who become more stubborn with age.
These men often spend a lot of time recounting past achievements, reminiscing about their contributions, and sharing wisdom from their life experiences.
It’s as if they’re trying to reinforce their legacy, to ensure they’re remembered in a certain way.
This focus on the past and on their accomplishments can sometimes make them seem difficult, especially when they resist acknowledging other perspectives or new ideas.
But it’s not about being stubborn. It’s about validating their life journey and asserting their relevance in a world that’s constantly moving forward.
8) Their stubbornness often masks deeper fears
The most crucial thing to understand about men who become more stubborn with age is that their stubbornness often hides deeper fears.
Fears of being irrelevant, of losing control, of being overlooked, or of facing their own mortality.
These fears aren’t easy to face, and being stubborn can be a way to shield themselves from these harsh realities.
So, the next time you encounter a man who seems increasingly obstinate with age, remember this.
It could be his way of coping with the complexities and challenges that come with growing older.
Understanding is the key to compassion
If you’ve journeyed with me this far, hopefully, you’ve gleaned that men who become more stubborn and difficult as they age are navigating their own unique challenges.
Remember, this perceived stubbornness isn’t just about being obstinate or resistant. It’s often a mask for deeper fears, a way to assert control, or an attempt to secure their legacy.
As American author Harper Lee once said in her celebrated novel “To Kill a Mockingbird”:
“You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view… until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.”
So the next time you encounter an older man who seems more stubborn than usual, take a moment to consider his perspective.
Understanding his journey might not only make him easier to deal with, but it could also deepen your compassion and empathy for him as he navigates the complexities of aging.
After all, understanding is the first step towards compassion. And compassion makes our world a little softer, a little kinder.
