If you want a more loving relationship with your child as they get older, say goodbye these behaviors

Navigating the journey of parenthood can be as challenging as it is rewarding.

It’s a fine line between guiding your child towards becoming a responsible adult, and maintaining a loving, open relationship as they grow older.

The key lies in understanding that certain behaviors can make or break this bond.

These are behaviors that may seem harmless now, but could potentially create barriers between you and your child in the future.

If you want a more loving relationship with your child as they grow older, it’s time to say goodbye to these behaviors.

In this article, I’m going to share with you some insights on which behaviors to let go of, and how to replace them with more empowering practices rooted in mindfulness and understanding.

Stay tuned if you’re ready for a transformative journey towards building a stronger, more loving relationship with your child.

1) Dictatorship vs. dialogue

In the world of parenting, having control can seem like the ultimate tool. We tend to believe that the more we control our children’s actions, the better they’ll turn out.

But this is a belief that needs to be let go if you want a more loving relationship with your child as they grow older.

Dictating every aspect of your child’s life can create resentment and hinder their ability to make decisions independently.

It’s important to remember that they’re individuals with their own thoughts and feelings.

Instead of enforcing a dictatorship, aim to create an open dialogue.

Encourage your child to express their thoughts and opinions, involve them in decision-making processes, and respect their choices.

This shift in behavior not only fosters a more loving relationship but also aids in developing your child’s confidence and decision-making skills.

Parenting isn’t about ruling—it’s about guiding.

And open dialogue is a crucial part of this guidance. Let go of the need to control and embrace the power of conversation.

2) Criticism vs. constructive feedback

I remember a time when my daughter came home with her first ever grade lower than a B.

Immediately, I felt a rush of disappointment and frustration. I was tempted to criticize her for not doing better, but then I remembered how damaging criticism can be.

Negative comments and harsh criticism can create self-doubt and a lack of self-esteem in children. It can push them away and make them less likely to confide in you as they grow older.

Instead of criticizing, I opted for constructive feedback. I sat down with my daughter and calmly discussed the grade.

We talked about what might have led to it and how she could improve. Most importantly, I reassured her that one grade doesn’t define her worth or intelligence.

And guess what? It worked. Instead of feeling defensive or upset, she was open to the conversation and even came up with a study plan for the next test.

The lesson here? Say goodbye to criticism and embrace the power of constructive feedback.

It’s a simple change that can significantly strengthen your relationship with your child.

3) Ignoring vs. active listening

Communication is a two-way street, and this is especially true in parenting.

It’s not enough to just talk to your child; you need to listen to them too.

Studies have found that active listening, where you fully focus on the speaker and respond in a way that shows understanding, can lead to greater emotional intelligence in children.

But it’s not just about hearing what they’re saying—it’s about showing interest, asking questions, and engaging in the conversation.

Next time your child is talking about their day or sharing their thoughts, resist the urge to multitask or nod absentmindedly. Instead, truly listen and engage with them.

This simple change can do wonders for your relationship, making your child feel valued and heard while also helping them develop their communication skills.

4) Dismissal vs. validation

Kids have big emotions, and sometimes as parents, we might dismiss these feelings as trivial or insignificant.

We might tell them that they’re overreacting or that they shouldn’t feel a certain way.

But here’s the thing: emotions are valid, regardless of age. Dismissing your child’s feelings can make them feel misunderstood and push them away.

Instead, try to validate their emotions. Acknowledge what they’re feeling and let them know it’s okay to feel that way.

You don’t have to agree with their reaction, but understanding and validating their emotions can go a long way in building a more loving relationship.

A little empathy can make a world of difference. Say goodbye to dismissal and hello to validation.

5) Projection vs. individuality

Growing up, I always felt an innate desire to follow in my father’s footsteps. He was a successful engineer, and I thought that was the path I should take too.

But as I grew older, I realized my passion was elsewhere.

When I became a parent, this experience reminded me of the importance of allowing my child to follow their own path.

It’s easy as parents to project our dreams and desires onto our children, but this can stifle their individuality and create resentment.

While it’s natural to want the best for our children, it’s crucial to remember that they are their own people with unique passions and interests.

Instead of projecting your own expectations, encourage your child’s individuality. Support their interests, even if they’re different from yours.

This not only fosters a more loving relationship but also helps your child develop their sense of self.

6) Neglect vs. quality time

In today’s fast-paced world, it’s easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of life.

But amidst all this, we must never forget the importance of quality time with our children.

Spending quality time doesn’t necessarily mean extravagant vacations or expensive outings.

It could be as simple as reading a book together, playing a board game, or even cooking dinner together.

Neglecting to spend quality time with your child can lead to feelings of isolation and neglect.

On the other hand, quality time helps build a stronger bond and allows for better understanding and communication.

Bid farewell to neglect and start investing in quality time with your child. It’s an investment that will pay off in a more loving relationship as they grow older.

7) Punishment vs. learning opportunities

Children make mistakes – it’s a part of their learning process. As parents, our instinct may be to punish them for their mistakes.

But what if we turned those mistakes into learning opportunities instead?

Punishment can breed fear and resentment, while learning opportunities foster growth and understanding.

Instead of grounding your child or taking away privileges, discuss what they did wrong, why it was wrong, and how they can make better choices in the future.

This approach not only promotes a more loving relationship but also equips your child with the skills they need to navigate life’s challenges on their own.

Consider it the ultimate gift you can give them as a parent.

Final reflection: The power of change

The journey of parenthood is an ongoing learning process, filled with trial and error, joy, and challenges.

It’s crucial to remember that as our children grow and evolve, so must our parenting approach.

The behaviors we say goodbye to today can pave the way for a more loving and understanding relationship tomorrow.

Children who feel understood and validated by their parents develop stronger self-esteem and are better equipped to handle life’s challenges.

As you reflect on your parenting journey, consider the power of change.

Remember that your actions and behaviors have a profound impact on your child’s development and the relationship you share.

Whether it’s spending quality time together, fostering open dialogue, or turning mistakes into learning opportunities—each step you take brings you closer to a more loving relationship with your child.

And isn’t that the most beautiful reward of parenting?