8 daily habits of people who will never find true and authentic love

It’s a common belief that finding true and authentic love is all about luck or destiny.

But, in my journey, I’ve discovered that it’s less about serendipity and more about our daily habits and actions.

The pursuit of love is not just a romantic endeavor.

It’s an exploration of self, an exercise in vulnerability, and a commitment to growth.

However, some habits can act as barriers to this beautiful journey.

Through my experiences and observations, I’ve identified eight daily habits that can hold people back from discovering authentic love.

These habits may seem harmless or insignificant but they can subtly sabotage our chances of finding meaningful connections.

1) Being in love with the idea of love

The concept of love is often glamorized.

Movies, songs, and novels paint a picture of an all-consuming passion, where two people are meant to complete each other.

It’s easy to fall in love with this idea of love.

However, true and authentic love is different from this fantasy.

It’s about two complete individuals choosing to share their lives, grow together, and support each other.

It involves compromise, understanding, and respect.

Those who are in love with the idea of love often fail to recognize the reality of a relationship.

Their focus remains on the highs and not the lows, on the passion and not the patience.

This skewed perception can prevent them from forming deep connections based on mutual respect and understanding.

If you find yourself constantly daydreaming about grand gestures and fairy-tale endings, it may be time to reassess.

2) Avoiding self-reflection

Personal growth and self-awareness are integral to finding authentic love.

This requires a willingness to look inward, to confront our fears, and to challenge our limiting beliefs.

In my journey, I’ve found that those who shy away from self-reflection often struggle to form deep and lasting connections.

They might ignore their emotions or avoid uncomfortable truths about themselves.

They might fail to understand how their actions and attitudes impact their relationships.

Facing ourselves, with all our imperfections, can be daunting.

But it’s through this process that we grow and become capable of giving and receiving authentic love.

Research indicates that self-compassion significantly enhances romantic relationship satisfaction.

This aligns with the idea that self-awareness and self-acceptance are crucial for personal growth and the ability to form authentic connections.

As the renowned psychologist Carl Rogers said, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”

It’s time to embrace this paradox.

Start by accepting yourself in all your complexity and then embark on the journey of personal growth.

This is the path to finding true love.

3) Sticking to societal conditioning around relationships

We often carry societal constructs and expectations into our relationships.

These preconceived notions of the ‘perfect partner’ or the ‘ideal relationship’ can hinder us from experiencing love in its most authentic form.

The key to breaking free from these shackles lies in personal growth and self-empowerment.

This is something I’ve learned from producing “The Art of Love and Intimacy” masterclass with the shaman Rudá Iandê.

The masterclass focuses on dismantling these myths and grounding individuals in reality.

A significant part of this masterclass is understanding that our external relationships reflect our internal relationship with ourselves.

By recognizing this, we take control of our personal development and break free from toxic relationship cycles.

The masterclass advocates for emotional independence, helping participants cultivate deeper, more meaningful connections.

This transformative approach aligns with my belief in personal empowerment, conscious living, and cultivating genuine, respectful connections.

I strongly encourage you to check out this free masterclass.

It’s a powerful tool that can significantly improve your approach to relationships, aiding you in your journey towards finding authentic love.

4) Fearing emotional independence

In our quest for love, we sometimes lose ourselves.

We cling to other people, hoping they will fill the voids within us.

This dependency can become a barrier to experiencing genuine love.

Following the teachings of the masterclass, it’s important to realize that our relationships reflect our inner world.

If we’re not emotionally independent, our relationships will mirror this lack of self-sufficiency.

Emotional independence doesn’t mean isolating yourself or avoiding intimacy.

It means being comfortable with who you are, understanding your emotions, and not relying on someone else for your happiness or self-worth.

This is a raw and honest truth that many of us struggle with.

It’s easier to depend on someone else than to face our insecurities or fears.

But true love thrives when two emotionally independent individuals choose to be together.

Are you ready to confront your fears and embrace emotional independence?

It’s only when you’re complete within yourself that you can form a truly authentic connection with someone else.

5) Prioritizing individual success over mutual growth

A study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that respect and pro-relationship behaviors from one partner can lead to similar behaviors from the other, fostering a cycle of mutual growth and increased relationship satisfaction.

In our journey to find love, we often focus on what we can gain from the relationship.

This mindset, driven by the societal emphasis on individual success, can limit our ability to experience authentic love.

True love isn’t just about what the relationship can offer us, but also about how we can grow together as a couple.

It’s about supporting each other’s dreams and aspirations, and learning from each other’s experiences.

This doesn’t mean that you should ignore your personal goals or lose your individuality.

Rather, it’s about creating a balance between your personal growth and the growth of your relationship.

Instead of focusing solely on your individual success, consider how you can contribute to the mutual growth of your relationship.

Authentic love flourishes when there’s a shared commitment to support each other and grow together.

6) Neglecting to confront limiting beliefs

Our beliefs shape our experiences, including our relationships.

If we hold limiting beliefs about love, we’re likely to experience them in our relationships.

Perhaps you believe you’re unworthy of love due to past experiences.

Maybe you think that true love exists only in fairy tales.

These limiting beliefs can prevent us from finding and experiencing authentic love.

Confronting these beliefs is a crucial step in our journey to love.

It involves honest self-reflection and a willingness to challenge our preconceptions.

By doing this inner work, we can replace limiting beliefs with empowering ones.

7) Being a passive participant in relationships

Love is not something that just happens to us.

It’s an active process that requires our full participation.

A study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that couples who engage in shared activities and maintain open communication experience higher levels of relationship satisfaction.

Being a passive participant in a relationship can lead to stagnation and dissatisfaction.

It means settling for less than what we deserve or failing to communicate our needs and desires.

Active participation involves being present, expressing yourself honestly, and striving for mutual understanding and growth in the relationship.

It means taking responsibility for your happiness and the health of the relationship.

8) Avoiding vulnerability

Vulnerability is often seen as a sign of weakness, but in reality, it’s a strength.

It’s the courage to be open, to express our emotions honestly, and to let others see us as we are.

Avoiding vulnerability in relationships can prevent us from forming deep connections.

It can keep us from sharing our true selves with our partner and experiencing the depth of authentic love.

Embracing vulnerability involves letting go of the fear of rejection or judgement.

It’s about showing up authentically in our relationships and allowing others to do the same.

Embracing authentic love

In this exploration of daily habits that can prevent us from finding authentic love, we’ve uncovered some profound insights.

We’ve learned that love is not about chasing fantasies or societal constructs but about embracing reality and personal growth.

It’s about taking responsibility for our happiness, confronting our limiting beliefs, and actively participating in our relationships.

These insights highlight the importance of emotional independence, mutual growth, and vulnerability in fostering authentic love.

They challenge common misconceptions about love and invite us to reassess our approach to relationships.

For those ready to delve deeper into these principles and apply them in their pursuit of love, I strongly recommend the free “The Art of Love and Intimacy” masterclass with Rudá Iandê.

This masterclass is a transformative experience that can significantly enhance your understanding of relationships.

The masterclass aligns perfectly with the insights we’ve shared here.

It teaches you how your relationships reflect your internal state and guides you to break free from limiting beliefs and societal conditioning.

The practical exercises within will empower you to cultivate deeper, more meaningful connections, furthering your journey towards authentic love.

Watching this masterclass will provide you with invaluable tools and insights that can guide you towards a more genuine, fulfilling experience of love.

It’s an opportunity to deepen your understanding of what it means to truly love and be loved in return.

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Justin Brown

Justin Brown is an entrepreneur and thought leader in personal development and digital media, with a foundation in education from The London School of Economics and The Australian National University. As the co-founder of Ideapod, The Vessel, and a director at Brown Brothers Media, Justin has spearheaded platforms that significantly contribute to personal and collective growth. His deep insights are shared on his YouTube channel, JustinBrownVids, offering a rich blend of guidance on living a meaningful and purposeful life.

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