While humans claim to want to receive and give unconditional love, the “unconditional” part often comes with many conditions including expectations and disappointment.
At the beginning of any relationship, it can seem like you, and your partner are perfect for each other.
You probably experience a lot of telltale signs like finishing each other’s sentences and even ordering the same food at restaurants.
But that stuff falls away over time, and soon enough you might become annoyed with someone finishing your sentences.
For couples who are really in sync though, I believe there are a number of things they share and do that make their relationship stand out.
The best part?
This stuff doesn’t just happen: couples work on their relationship to keep it strong. So that means that anyone can experience this kind of deep connection, as long as they are willing to work for it.
In my experience, there are 5 habits that stand out that show a strong connection:
1) You Share Things Without Realizing It
One way that deeply connected couples stay connected is by sharing aspects of their lives beside the usual “how was your day?” content.
Sure, it’s a good icebreaker at the end of the day, but if you want to connect with your partner on a deeper level, you are going to have to do better than that.
Close couples read books and passages to one another, they share things they’ve learned, they dream about the future and talk about those dreams.
Couples who struggle to find a deep connection don’t usually branch out with their conversations, and this often finds them pursuing individual dreams and desires, instead of common goals.
2) You Aren’t Afraid of Silence
Deeply connected couples know that connection goes well beyond conversation. In order to be content in a relationship, people need time to process and reflect on the relationship.
This means that deeply connected couples take time to understand their relationship from their own perspective, but also, share the silent space between them.
For strained relationships, silence can be deadly, but if you respect each other in the silence, it can improve your connection and relationship overall.
The trick is to not force the conversation or connection. If you are deeply connected, you will be comfortable with silence.
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3) You Are Open and Honest Communicators
You might think that deeply connected couples get along every second of the day, but you’d be wrong.
In fact, deeply connected couples are better fighters and lovers because of their open and honest communication skills.
This is something that might have taken them a long time to establish, but because they are willing to work on their communication skills, they are better equipped to deal with the hard times in their relationships.
Rather than scream at each other and storm away, deeply connected couples can talk through their issues without malice and find resolution through patience and respect.
When it comes to communication, you’re honest like best friends.
4) You Stay Curious About Each Other
Have you ever looked at your partner and wondered what you don’t know about them? After 5, 10 or even 30 years together, connected couples continue to ask deep questions and wonder about their partners.
Rather than assume they know everything, they seek to understand more. This is achieved through conversation, questioning, admiration, exploration, and wonder.
Because people change all the time, any time is the right time to increase your curiosity about your partner and start to develop a deeper connection.
5) You Stay Objective About The Relationship
Deeply connected couples are able to stay together and love each other in a more fulfilling way because they don’t project blame or responsibility on the other person.
Instead, they turn inward and focus on their own shortcomings and consider the ways they can contribute to the relationship to make it better.
Most of us would blame the other person for how we feel or for the failure of the relationship because we don’t like to take responsibility for ourselves.
When you take the other person out of the equation and look at your own actions, you can be more objective about what is really going on and take responsibility for your part.
This gives you the insight to be able to have a conversation about concerns and issues without blaming the other person.
So no matter where you are in your relationship status, you can start to develop a deeper relationship by being accountable for your actions, words, thoughts, and feelings.
Can a relationship coach help you too?
If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach.
I know this from personal experience…
A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, they gave me a unique insight into the dynamics of my relationship and how to get it back on track.
If you haven’t heard of Relationship Hero before, it’s a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations.
In just a few minutes you can connect with a certified relationship coach and get tailor-made advice for your situation.
I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was.
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