When we hear the word “confidence”, we often think of a person who is kind and motivates others to reach their full potential.
However, some people take it the wrong way and mistake confidence for excessive pride.
The cost of being self-secure can involve intimidating other people, often building a wall between you and a potential friend.
If you want to further understand what aspects of your personality other people may find daunting, here are the 10 signs that you have a confident personality that sometimes intimidates others:
1) You Have No Room For Excuses
One of the reasons why people may find you intimidating is your aversion to excuses. You’re not one to make excuses or settle for less.
This is why people often view you as having high standards and a no-nonsense attitude.
While this is a great thing when it comes to achieving your goals, it can also make others feel like they are being held accountable and judged.
While some people may take your no-nonsense attitude as offensive, you know that when people understand that excuses will not be tolerated, they are more likely to take responsibility for their actions and work towards finding solutions rather than blaming external factors.
This is why you don’t settle for less, and even though it often leads to greater success, it can also create a sense of pressure to perform and meet expectations.
2) You’re Unsparingly Straightforward
You find no reason to lie because you know that there’s always a huge value in the truth.
So other people may tend to hesitate to approach you because of your lack of filter.
This is a cost that you’ve acknowledged for the sake of being a staunch advocate of being a catalyst for change.
I would actually give anything to have more people be more straightforward and brutally honest with me.
Being spared from the truth will only do more harm than good as it will prevent me from changing the things that I needed to change to achieve more growth at the highest levels.
But some people don’t see it that way. They’d rather avoid the harsh truths about life in order to maintain their comfort.
3) Ignorance Irks You
Confident people may understand mediocrity, but they can never tolerate ignorance.
Your self-taught knowledge is something you’re immensely proud of.
So when people make instant judgments about people and things they don’t know anything about, it irks you to your core.
You’ve put time into your brain, and you encourage others to do the same.
In a world of algorithmic newsfeeds you have no control over, you know that thinking for yourself is one of the most important qualities one can have.
While you don’t mean to offend anyone, you can’t help but become overly assertive or dismissive in response to ignorance, especially if you believe it challenges your own values or expertise.
4) You’re Not Afraid to Voice Your Opinion
Ever since a young age, I’ve always told people what I thought.
I’ve been quick to share my opinions and ideas. I enjoy getting others’ perspectives and discussing different approaches.
But one thing I’ve noticed is that this can be super unpopular too.
Whilst some like-minded strong people equally get a kick out of debate, others find it incredibly threatening.
I think this is why:
Some people become overly identified with their own ideas and opinions to the extent that they can’t step back.
So when a confident person comes along and gives their opinion freely, they can’t handle it.
If it doesn’t match up with their own, they feel like it’s an attack on them.
Of course, this wasn’t the intention.
But it’s the reason why a confident person is always going to potentially intimidate without meaning to.
5) You Speak Clearly and Powerfully
The power of speech is often underestimated, but it shouldn’t be!
One of the hallmarks of an intimidating and confident person is that they speak with good diction and audible volume.
You don’t mumble or hide her words, neither do you try to sound more casual or more formal than you are.
After all:
You have nothing to hide because you’re confident in your beliefs and opinions. This is why you speak directly and clearly, and you also speak in an informed way.
As a confident person, you can’t help but project your voice and orients yourself directly facing the person or people you are speaking to, making eye contact with them.
You say what you mean and mean what you say.
Unfortunately, this can be intimidating for some people.
6) You Stand Up for Yourself and Others
Are you the one who sticks up for the little guy?
If so, it’s another sign you have a confident and strong personality. And guess who will find this intimidating?
Bullies!
That’s right, someone who takes advantage of others, or is mean or manipulative, will find you an absolute nightmare to be around.
You have no problem standing up for yourself and others, asserting boundaries, and following up on the consequences when these limits are crossed.
To someone who has no respect or consideration for others, this can be extremely challenging.
7) Leadership Roles Seem Fitting To You
If you often find yourself taking charge of leading a group, it may be because of your intimidatingly confident personality.
This may be rooted in the fact that your confidence has a certain assertive appeal to it, which makes you the most likely commander of the group.
But do note that other people may perceive your assertive quality as an effort to be domineering and bossy.
Furthermore:
It takes someone with boldness and courage to lead the pack, so some people might find this intimidating as it may highlight their own inability to take charge.
If they’re insecure or shy, your assertiveness could come across as judgemental, or even borderline rude, especially if people aren’t used to this type of leadership style.
But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be your natural, confident self…instead, learn how to approach people in different ways. This could reduce how intimidated some people feel around you.
8) You’re Friendly but Not Fake
Sadly, there is such a thing as being too nice and too open.
The hallmark of an intimidating confident person is that they’re very kind and nice but also no pushover.
You may have a genuine smile and light up a room, but you’re not just there to smile and nod.
You befriend who you choose to, you’re polite to the rest, and you treat troublemakers with sharp wit and you confront them if necessary.
A genuine and confident person is friendly to others but you’re never fake.
You don’t plaster on a smile just to be “safe” or be liked.
If you have some reason to distrust or dislike you it will be very clear from the first moment you lock eyes.
Unlike some people who smile fakely or feign interest in people to avoid conflict, the intimidating confident person never hides who they really are or how they feel.
9) You Manage Your Insecurities Well
Being confident doesn’t always entail the absence of insecurities.
Insecurities are a part of life, and there are things that are easier to change about yourself.
But being confident involves so much self-acceptance, so although there’s still a certain level that insecurities bother you, these are well-managed.
After all:
You’re comfortable with who you are and you’re not afraid to show your authentic self.
This can be in big contrast with individuals who struggle with self-acceptance and insecurity, and who may feel inadequate in comparison.
And let’s not forget that being around someone who is confident in their own skin can be a reminder of one’s own insecurities and areas for self-improvement.
10) You Have A Strong Moral Compass
Being confident in every way may also mean you have an unwavering sense of right and wrong.
You tend to be headstrong and firm in the beliefs that have always led your life, which other people may find intimidating and sometimes annoying.
Aside from that, when I said that confident people are not the kind of people to make excuses, it doesn’t simply apply when achieving goals, but rather in doing what is right as well.
People would always make excuses for their poor behavior and lack of manners, but you wouldn’t have any of it.
Other people may find it hard to relate with you on this matter so they tend to avoid interactions with you.
A confident person’s unfailing moral compass is actually the primary reason why they’re bold enough to call people out on their wrongdoings.
Consequently, this may also be the source as to why we’re so confident in the decisions that we make if we know for a fact that there’s nothing wrong with them.
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