Pearl Nash
Being a classy woman doesn’t just mean being a woman who’s sophisticated, stylish, and accustomed to all the finer things in life.
Sometimes, you’ll recognize a classy woman by how she deals with the little things. You won’t find her fussing over minor annoyances.
Sure, she might find something inconvenient, but she won’t waste her time fretting and throwing a tantrum about it.
How does she do that? How come she stays relaxed and composed in the face of the little things in life that can drive anyone else crazy?
Well, you’ll know soon enough. In this article, I’ll list why classy women stay unflappable.
Let’s dive in!
1) They prioritize their time and energy
Classy women understand that sweating the small stuff takes up valuable time and energy that they could better spend on more important matters.
Instead, they choose to focus on what truly matters and let go of the petty, insignificant details. They prefer to reserve their energy for their goals and other valuable aspects of their lives.
2) They have self-control and discipline
Screaming at the waiter over a long wait in a restaurant? Or at someone who bumped into them on the street? Classy women don’t do that.
They have the self-control and discipline to stay calm and composed, even in difficult situations.
They can keep their emotions in check and maintain their poise rather than letting their feelings get the best of them. Exercising grace, patience, and self-restraint is important to them.
3) They have a positive attitude
Joyful living is a significant life philosophy for classy women. As designer Yves Saint Laurent once said, “Without elegance of the heart, there is no elegance.”
They know that life has its ups and downs but tend to have a positive attitude and focus on the positive side instead of dwelling on the negative.
This helps them to stay calm and not get worked up over minor issues.
4) They are confident and self-assured
Classy women have a strong sense of self-assurance and confidence, which helps them to stay calm and collected under pressure.
They are not easily flustered or rattled because they know they can handle challenges with grace and poise.
5) They can communicate their boundaries clearly
Classy women are skilled communicators who can express their thoughts and feelings clearly and calmly.
They can assert themselves without being aggressive or confrontational, so they avoid the resentment and frustration that often happens when people overstep one’s boundaries.
6) They have strong problem-solving skills
Classy women are resourceful and able to think on their feet, which helps them to find solutions to problems rather than getting stuck in a rut.
They don’t try to do everything—they choose their battles and focus on the few things that will add value to their lives.
So, when faced with a conflict, they can take a practical approach to resolution instead of getting caught up in the drama.
7) They have excellent social skills
You’ll never find classy women engaged in a catfight or petty quarrels.
That’s because they can interact with others graciously and respectfully and know the right things to say.
They can navigate social situations with ease and poise, which prevents them from getting caught up in petty squabbles and misunderstandings.
8) They have high self-esteem
Classy women tend to have high self-esteem and a strong sense of self-worth, which helps them to stay confident and composed even in challenging situations.
They aren’t easily swayed by the opinions of others and can stand up for themselves without getting worked up.
9) They have exceptional emotional intelligence
Being emotionally intelligent is a trait common in classy women. They can identify and understand their own emotions and the emotions of others.
Research says that being self-aware is a crucial component of emotional intelligence. And because classy women have a strong sense of self-awareness, they have a high level of emotional intelligence.
Thus, they can empathize with others while staying in control of their emotional life. This helps them to remain level-headed and not get caught up in petty arguments or conflicts.
10) They have a strong sense of purpose
Classy women have a strong sense of purpose and are focused on achieving their goals.
They know they can’t control everything that happens in life, so they look instead at what they can control and shift their attention to that.
They are able to prioritize their time and energy toward what truly matters to them, which prevents them from getting sidetracked by minor issues.
How to let go of the small stuff
Do the PR plan
Psychologist Dr. Patrick Keelan recommends the PR plan for training yourself to be less likely to get upset over the small stuff when they happen.
This plan has three steps: Predict, Prepare, and Practice.
Predicting means you look ahead and try to predict the specific challenges that may pop up during your day. This could be minor things like a long line at the checkout counter at the grocery store or an unexpected traffic jam.
Then, prepare by identifying what you can do to handle these challenges. Ask yourself, “How can I make this easier?”
For example, you could bring music to listen to or a book to read while you wait in line.
The last step is to practice. Rehearse or create a visual image in your head of you responding to these challenges with the strategies you’ve prepared.
I’ve learned this really helpful tip for dealing with drivers who cut in line. Instead of getting worked up and fuming in my car, I have a scripted response to keep me calm.
So, when a rude driver cuts in, I first get that unavoidable initial urge to scream, then I repeat the words I’d decided to use beforehand—”He must be in a real hurry; I hope he stays safe.”
It might sound cheesy, but it works to calm me down and not ruin my day with negative vibes.
Keep things in perspective
This is a great strategy to train yourself to temper your emotional reactions. When you think of the big picture, you have a broader view and can easily see which things matter and which don’t.
Richard Carlson, the author of the book, “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff,” has a fantastic tip about this—when faced with a stressful situation, you should ask yourself, “Will this matter a year from now?”
This question is perfect for framing matters in a different light and helps you figure out if this minor annoyance is worth your time and energy.
So, the next time you catch yourself stressing over how your new curtains don’t match your wallpaper, ask yourself this question.
Final thoughts
If you’ve always looked up to certain women for their class and elegance, remember that you can be one, too.
Elegant living involves knowing which things to focus on and editing your life so that it’s simple and easy to manage.
Don’t be afraid to say no to drama and life’s petty annoyances. After all, as Coco Chanel said:
“Elegance is refusal.”
When you refuse to be upset over tiny, insignificant things, you’re taking charge of your life and being a classy woman yourself.
