Physical beauty matters, but attractive traits run much deeper.
We often don’t notice how beautiful or ugly somebody really is until we see them under stress or when their social mask is completely off.
Here are the traits to watch out for in order to see the true beauty of somebody.
Sincerity is something to never take for granted.
If you’ve met enough insincere people you come to know the enormous value of authenticity.
When somebody says what they mean and means what they say it’s like finding a gold nugget in a pile of pyrite.
Sincerity can’t be replaced, and it makes somebody truly beautiful.
As we age, many of us lose our playful edge and become ultra serious.
There are many times in life when it’s good to be serious, and even necessary, for example as a parent, executive or responsible member of society.
But that playful edge of our inner child is something beautiful.
Those who manage to keep it are truly attractive.
Whether it’s a small prank on a friend or a sense of humor that keeps others laughing, this beautiful trait shouldn’t be underestimated.
Those people who are truly grateful stand out from all the rest.
I’m not really one of them, but I know people in my life who are genuinely full of gratitude through life’s ups and downs.
They are incredibly beautiful and even just a short email or note from them lights up the day.
They have an inner energy burning that fills them with gratitude when the rest of us would complain or become a victim.
People who are honest with themselves also stand out from the crowd.
This is often a correlative of maturity and becoming a more grown-up and responsible person.
But there is a significant portion of the population which will lie to itself no matter what.
It’s like a sedative drug that assures us we have no control:
“Yes, I hate this job, but what choice do I have?”
“Yes, this relationship is abusive, but I won’t find any better if I leave.”
Beautiful people don’t lie to themselves no matter what.
The beautiful person knows that it’s OK to not be OK.
This does not mean they play the victim: as I said, gratitude is one of the key attributes of those who are attractive inside out.
This may seem counterintuitive but it makes sense:
The person who’s beautiful inside is OK with showing themselves flaws and all.
They have no need of a beautiful facade to lean on. They are who they are and they’re open about that, scars and all.
The person who’s accountable even when they don’t have to be displays their true inner beauty.
When a person shows that they stand behind what they say and do, it adds a respect and a depth to everything else they do.
This speaks to the point I initially made about sincerity as well.
Knowing someone stands behind what they say and do is highly attractive and engenders profound respect.
The person who has fortitude in the face of life’s storms is deeply attractive.
Let’s face it: many don’t.
When you meet someone who maintains their inner wellbeing and calm it’s definitely notable.
This is attractive and magnetic: a person who keeps their head while all about them people are losing theirs, as the author and poet Rudyard Kipling put it.
Everything from the news to so much popular music these days seems to be very “in your face.”
Narratives are completely black and white with no room for critical thought…
Top chart music switches into a heavy beat right away to get the attention of listener’s right away…
That’s why subtlety is so attractive.
A person who’s willing to get to know somebody before asking them out; an individual who tells a joke that isn’t completely surface level.
There are a hundred other examples of subtlety, but there’s no doubt it’s a highly attractive trait.
Generosity is another one of those character traits that’s highly attractive and seen less and less.
In a world of people posting #giving and #gratitude all over Instagram you’d be excused for being surprised at how transactional many people are in reality.
Give me this shoutout in return for that back link, do this nice thing for me and maybe I’ll do a nice thing for you.
You provide this erotic service and simulacrum of romantic or sexual connection and I’ll pay.
We’ve become so accustomed to the transactional nature of everything in life, that some of it may even seem normal, but the truth is that it’s quite sad.
Having lived in various developing countries I’ve also seen the shift in real-time from community, family-based economies and systems to completely commodified and monetized systems.
Instead of caring who you are or where you’re from and your relation to my family, I now care solely about how much money you can give me or help me access.
The person who’s truly beautiful isn’t able to stomach the monetization of life and love.
It makes them sick.
As the Avett Brothers sing in their song “True Sadness” about a young woman lured into the porn business:
“Angela became a target
As soon as her beauty was seen
By young men who try to reduce her down
To a scene on an x-rated screen
Is she not more than the curve of her hips?
Is she not more than the shine on her lips?”
Patience is a virtue in the Christian faith and in many cultures and traditions including those of ancient Greece and Rome.
The reason that patience is so valued is that patience has many benefits in life.
It isn’t easy to be patient and there are times when it’s
11) Artistic and aesthetic appreciation
There are those who pass by a beautiful painting or sculpture and are truly wowed by what they see…
Or those who wake up and see the sunset and are inspired for the entire day…
This kind of appreciation is not a given, and there are those who’d rather ogle their smartphone than a painting by Sandro Botticelli.
That’s why meeting those who are wowed by beauty is a defining moment.
This makes sense, really:
The ability to be stunned wordless by beauty requires you to recognize beauty.
And recognizing beauty requires you to have beauty within yourself or at least know it when you see it.
12) Spiritual thirst
If you meet a seeker on the path, you’ll know.
These people may come across within the structure of organized religion or within alternative and spiritual paths…
The common denominator is a thirst for truth.
This can’t be simulated or spurred by the outside, it has to come from the inside.
Once such a quest is underway there are all sorts of people claiming to offer quick fixes and shortcuts to their version of the truth.
But the truly beautiful person is the one who doesn’t accept any cookie cutter answers and finds out for themselves.
You’re beautiful, it’s true…
If somebody has the character traits above they’re a beautiful person.
There’s no ifs ands or buts about it.
It’s also crucial that you always remember that you’re a beautiful person, too.
If you exhibit the above traits, good on you.
If there’s still work to do, there’s always time and space to keep improving and becoming more self-aware of how you act in the world.
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