Are you a lone wolf? 7 signs you’re a fiercely independent person

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When you’re a truly independent person, chances are, you probably don’t even realize you are.

When I think about all the fiercely independent people in my life, if you tell them they’re a bit of an introvert, are very strong, or are someone who likes to do things by themselves, they usually look at you and go, “Really? I didn’t realize!”

That’s because it can be way harder to spot what traits you have yourself.

And, if you’re truly a lone wolf, you probably don’t rely on other people’s opinions of you or their validation very often.

Let’s explore these 7 signs you’re a fiercely independent person.

1) You like to keep some evenings and weekends free

When you’re a lone wolf, you like your alone time.

You’re not always running full speed on the hamster wheel, booking dinner with friends on weeknights and dates every weekend.

While you like making plans with loved ones occasionally, you also like spending time alone.

You probably never book plans for both Friday and Saturday night. And if you’re out on Saturday, you probably won’t want to do anything on the Sunday.

Essentially, you prioritize your me-time and have no issue keeping some weekends and evenings free to do absolutely nothing.

2) You’ve chosen to stop dating (if you’re single)

People in relationships don’t automatically lose their independence (provided they’re in a healthy relationship).

It’s important to still have your own friends, your own hobbies, and time alone when you’re dating someone – no matter how long you’ve been together.

But if you’re a single lone wolf, you might have chosen to just stop dating.

Dating apps and being single in the modern age can be somewhat exhausting.

As many relationship experts say, dating is a numbers game that requires consistent effort to find the person who’s right for you.

And if you’re not 100% into the idea of sharing your alone time with someone else, you’ll probably find the dating apps even harder to navigate.

So even if it’s just for a short while or indefinitely until you feel otherwise, you might’ve chosen to stop dating and just enjoy singlehood for the foreseeable.

3) You don’t ask for help unless it’s absolutely necessary

Repeat after me: there’s nothing wrong with needing help and asking for help.

We’re all human and we all need help sometimes. And that doesn’t make us any less strong or independent.

But when you’re a lone wolf, you prefer to do everything you can by yourself first before asking for help.

Whether that’s changing a lightbulb or figuring out how to defrost your fridge-freezer.

You’ll do your best to learn how to do things yourself, and you’ll only ask for help once you’ve exhausted all options and have no other choice.

4) You can happily go the entire day without speaking to anyone

Socializing is good for the brain, body, and soul.

Experts frequently cite that we humans are social creatures, and connecting with others regularly increases your sense of happiness and sharpens your memory.

It can even help you live longer.

Without socialization, studies say you’re at a higher risk of depression and more likely to experience a lower quality of life.

But when you’re a lone wolf, you can easily spend an entire day not speaking to anyone.

If you’re working from home, you revel in the days when not a single person calls or emails you, so you can just get on with the task at hand uninterrupted.

If you’re having a lazy Sunday, curling up with your book all day, or laying on the couch in front of the TV, not engaging with a single soul, is your idea of the perfect weekend.

5) You don’t like to owe anyone money and enjoy living off your own means

When you’re fiercely independent, nothing irks you more than owing people money.

Because you like to be financially independent and enjoy living off your own income, you have to pay people back immediately after borrowing money.

If they book something on your behalf, you’re the first person in the group chat to ask how much money you owe them (and the first to send it!).

When you’re on a date, you’ll happily pay for the next round of drinks or your own dinner that night.

You also never ask to borrow large sums of money from friends or family.

Because having your own money is important to you, and you don’t like to rely on others to fund your lifestyle.

6) You have a smaller-than-average social circle

Another sign you’re a lone wolf and fiercely independent is if you have a smaller-than-average social circle.

You still have friends and family members you see often. But you don’t necessarily have a wide array of friends that you hang out with all the time.

You may not even have a “big” friendship group.

Instead, you often find yourself spending time with a few close friends one-on-one for dinner, drinks, or attending a mutually enjoyable event together.

Or visiting family for a relaxed lunch or cup of coffee at their place.

Because you don’t need to always be busy or keep friends for the sake of it.

Instead, you’re perfectly happy with your own company or the company of a trusted few others.

7) You rely on yourself and self-validate often

As a fiercely independent person, you rely on yourself and don’t seek validation from others very often.

You know how to be alone and how to do things by yourself. And you have the inner confidence to do what you want to do without the approval of the people around you.

Like when you’re invited to a work event, you don’t need to know what everyone else is wearing.

And you certainly don’t need to get the OK from anyone else on your outfit choice before showing up in it.

If you want to start dating someone new or change your job role, you can do it without the go-ahead of your parents or friends.

Because you make decisions for yourself when you’re a lone wolf and, even though it’s nice (and human nature) to get validation sometimes, you don’t need it to live.

Final thoughts

Just because you’re a lone wolf, that doesn’t mean you’re a hermit who stays in every weekend and doesn’t socialize with anyone (although that’s an introvert’s idea of a perfect weekend!).

But it does mean you probably enjoy more alone time than time with others, and you have a pretty small (but intimate) social circle.

And while there are some downsides to being a lone wolf (like not always asking for help when you need it), there are many positives to being so independent in life!

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Tina Fey

I'm Tina Fey, the founder of the blog Love Connection. I've extremely passionate about sharing relationship advice. I've studied psychology and have my Masters in marital, family, and relationship counseling. I hope with all my heart to help you improve your relationships, and I hope that even if one thing I write helps you, it means more to me than just about anything else in the world. Check out my blog Love Connection, and if you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Twitter

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