There’s no doubt that there is such a thing as a “good woman”, and depending on who you ask, the answer might end up being a little different.
This is, quite understandably, confusing and frustrating.
So to help you out, in this article I will give you 10 definite traits that make up a good woman—and trust me, it doesn’t include being cheerful!
1. A good woman is essentially a good person
So let me clarify something real quick—when people bring up the idea of a “good woman,” it’s often in the context of “how well does this woman fit her gender role?”
And this idea is, simply put, wrong and harmful.
A woman being assertive or sexual does not make her a “bad” woman, just as being submissive and chaste won’t make her “good.”
In an ideal world, we wouldn’t even think about whether someone’s a “good woman” or a “good man.” Instead we would simply wonder if they’re a good person.
And that is because when you look past the expectations society has set for us and instead look at one another as people… it turns out that gender is frankly irrelevant when you’re trying to say if someone’s good or not.
2. A good woman goes beyond “nice” and “pretty”
One of the expectations people have when they think of a “good woman” are traits like being nice or being sweet.
But these things are just traits that lie at the surface, and a good woman knows she’s more than just these skin-deep traits and impressions.
She doesn’t try to seem nice or sweet. In fact, she would not hesitate to be firm about her boundaries or to say no even if it makes her look “mean.”
Instead, she genuinely cares for other people and will try to lend an ear or a helping hand whenever she’s able.
3. A good woman doesn’t use her gender as a weapon
There are women who take advantage of their gender to get what they want.
They might think “oh, my boss is desperate for a girl’s attention. If I flirt with him, he’ll promote me!.”
And there are those who say “Back off, you wouldn’t want to hurt a lady!” if a guy they’ve been gossiping about gets mad at them.
A good woman does not do any of these things. She does not take advantage of her gender as a weapon to get away with things that she wouldn’t have otherwise.
She might not necessarily ignore that someone is of a different gender, but she won’t think too much of it either.
Instead, she sees other people as simply that—people. And with that in mind, she tries to treat everyone equally.
4. A good woman doesn’t put men down
Feminism is a good thing—it might seem unthinkable now, but at one point women didn’t have the right to vote, open their own bank accounts, or even owning property.
All these rights and more were earned because feminists worked hard to fight for them.
But sometimes some women take the idea way too far and end up believing that to be a “good woman” you must be hard on men.
But being a genuinely good woman doesn’t mean picking up misandry just because a lot of men don’t treat women right—an eye for an eye makes the world blind after all.
Instead, she tries her best to see everyone equally regardless of their gender or social standing, and does not entertain thoughts of being seen as superior to others.
5. A good woman is independent
It’s not just because she’s a fan of Beyoncé or that she wants to prove something.
A good woman is someone who is independent in every single way. She does not rely on her friends and family to support her, she does not NEED a guy to keep her emotionally stable, and thinks for herself instead of letting others do the thinking for her.
This is something that, amusingly enough, goes against what some people think a good woman should be. There are still some men who think that a good woman should NOT be independent, and instead rely on them and agree to everything they say.
But here’s a little secret—these men don’t actually care about the women at their side. They just want a trophy they can show off.
6. A good woman knows how to manage her emotions
Women have always been seen as more emotional than men, and some earlier studies seem to confirm this. This is most likely false, of course—more recent studies have indicated that men and women are equally emotional.
The differences lie in how men and women are expected to handle emotions differently. Women are expected to let out whatever they’re feeling at any given time, while men are expected to hold it in until they explode.
Neither of these scream “good emotional management”, and a good woman knows this. So she takes the time and effort to actually manage her emotions.
She isn’t controlled by her feelings. Instead, it’s the other way around. So she knows when to shut her mouth, and when to vent so that she won’t end up exploding in someone’s face.
7. A good woman is honest and trustworthy
Women are often stereotyped as being tattletales—of being untrustworthy because of how they would openly gossip about supposed “secrets”.
Now, gossip is not entirely bad. It often serves as a way for women to warn one another of dangerous people—a necessity, given how many women are often the victims of such crimes as assault and spiked drinks.
When engaging in talk of any kind—and especially gossip—a good woman knows not to share secrets and other things they were told in confidence, as well as to tell lies that would ruin someone innocent.
She’s someone you can trust to be honest, and to be someone you can trust with your secrets.
8. A good woman is open-minded
A good woman does not reject new ideas and perspectives right off the bat. Instead, she takes the time to think, consider, and even debate before she forms her opinions.
This is not to say that she’ll always entertain you, of course. She’s also smart enough to discern when an idea is completely bollocks and not waste her time entertaining it.
Imagine telling a baker, for example, that a bread with one cup of salt for every two cups of flour would be a good idea. The baker will immediately know that the resulting bread will simply be awful.
But so long as the idea is not too nonsensical, a good woman will try to see new ideas and new perspectives when able instead of immediately passing judgment.
9. A good woman is appreciative
A good woman does not take anything for granted.
She puts in the effort to appreciate everything that she has, be it a thousand-dollar bottle of wine or a two-dollar sandwich. And most important of all, she appreciates herself.
Being appreciative by default and seeing the value even in things that most people would find mundane is a virtue, and it’s something that makes such women a joy to be around.
10. A good woman gets things done
Some people are all talk. They would boast about accomplishing great things… and then do nothing to actually make it happen.
A good woman isn’t like that. Instead, she puts her efforts into actually doing things—if she needs to go to work at eight, she would wake up at six and drive to work early to avoid getting stuck in traffic.
When she promises to find solutions to problems, she’ll do whatever it takes because she knows people rely on her. Yep, even if she’s having a hard day and has to attend her son’s football game.
A good woman will always find solutions, not excuses.
People can sometimes have differing opinions on what it takes for one to be a “good woman”, and not all of them are exactly appropriate in this day and age.
But the thing is that people are simply making it more complicated than it has to be, thinking that a woman should act or look a certain way to be “good.”
The fact is that in the end, the secret to being a good woman is to simply be a good and genuine human being—something that, sadly, way too few people actually bother trying.
So if you are a woman possessing most of the traits in this list, be proud of yourself. And if you’re a man and you see most of these traits in your woman, you’re one lucky chap!