9 signs you’re dealing with a genuinely toxic person, according to psychology

Navigating human interactions can be a minefield, especially when dealing with toxic individuals.

Identifying a toxic person isn’t always straightforward, as they often disguise their toxicity with charm and manipulation.

But don’t worry, psychology comes to our rescue with some clear signs to spot these individuals.

In this article, I’ll highlight the 9 signs that you’re dealing with a genuinely toxic person, according to psychology.

Let’s get started. 

1) They are never wrong

Ever tried to reason with someone who simply refuses to admit they’re wrong?

This is a common trait of toxic individuals.

According to psychology, toxic people often exhibit an inability to accept their mistakes. They have a distorted sense of their own perfection and cannot tolerate the idea of being flawed.

Instead of admitting they’re wrong, they’ll manipulate the situation, twist facts or blame others to uphold their illusion of perfection.

If you often find yourself feeling guilty or wrong even when you know you’re not, you might be dealing with a genuinely toxic person.

It’s healthy and human to admit mistakes. Anyone who can’t might be causing more harm than good in your life.

2) They drain your energy

We all have those people in our lives who just seem to suck the energy right out of us.

I remember a friend I used to have, let’s call her Sarah. Every time I was around Sarah, I’d leave feeling drained, negative, and overwhelmed. Our conversations were always about her problems, her life, her drama. She rarely took interest in my life or asked about my wellbeing.

Psychology points out that toxic people are often emotional vampires. They feed off your energy, leaving you feeling depleted and emotionally exhausted.

If you consistently feel drained after spending time with a certain person, it’s a pretty good sign they’re toxic to your mental health. It’s important to recognize this and establish boundaries for your own wellbeing.

3) They use passive-aggressive behavior

Toxic individuals have a knack for expressing hostility or negativity in indirect ways. This is known as passive-aggressive behavior.

Instead of openly expressing their feelings or grievances, they resort to subtle actions like backhanded compliments, silent treatment, or deliberate procrastination.

Not only does this behavior have a negative effect on those around them, but it can also negatively impact the health of the toxic person themselves.

4) They lack empathy

One of the most telling signs of a toxic person is their lack of empathy.

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It’s what allows us to connect with people on a deep, emotional level.

Toxic individuals, however, often struggle with this. They have a hard time seeing things from other people’s perspectives and showing genuine concern for their feelings.

If you notice someone consistently demonstrating a disregard for how others feel, especially when those feelings are a result of their own actions, this could be a clear sign of toxicity.

Everyone deserves to be treated with understanding and respect. Don’t settle for anything less.

5) They’re always the victim

Toxic people have a knack for always playing the victim, no matter the circumstance.

If something goes wrong, it’s never their fault. They always find someone else to blame for their misfortunes or ill behaviors. It’s as if they live in a continuous drama, and they are always the unfortunate protagonist.

By doing this, they manage to deflect any responsibility for their actions while gaining sympathy and attention from others.

However, this perpetual victim mentality is not only unhealthy but also a clear sign of a toxic personality. Life is about taking responsibility for your actions, not blaming others for your shortcomings.

6) They constantly belittle you

No one has the right to belittle you or make you feel less than.

Yet, toxic individuals often resort to demeaning comments, sarcasm, or cruel jokes aimed at undermining your self-esteem. They may even disguise these hurtful remarks as “just kidding” or “only teasing”.

This can be incredibly hurtful and damaging over time, leading to a significant drop in self-confidence and self-worth.

You deserve respect and kindness from those around you. If someone consistently belittles you, know that it’s a reflection of their character, not your value. Stand strong in your worth and don’t let anyone make you feel otherwise.

7) They undermine your accomplishments

A toxic person often feels threatened by the success of others. Instead of celebrating your achievements, they belittle them or make you feel guilty for your success.

For instance, they might say things like, “You got that promotion because you were lucky,” or “Anyone could have done that if they tried.”

This constant undermining can erode your self-esteem over time.

It’s important to remember that your accomplishments are valid and deserve to be recognized. If you find yourself in a situation where someone consistently devalues your achievements, it might be a sign of their own insecurities manifesting as toxicity.

To better understand how to navigate these challenging interactions and maintain your sense of self-worth, I highly recommend reading my book, Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego.

This book delves into practical wisdom and mindfulness techniques that can help you stay grounded and resilient in the face of such negativity.

By embracing these principles, you can protect your peace and continue to thrive despite the presence of toxic individuals.

8) They’re excessively controlling

Another characteristic of toxic individuals is their need to control others.

They often dictate how you should think, feel, and behave. They might use emotional manipulation, guilt-tripping, or even threats to get their way.

This controlling behavior is not only suffocating but also deeply disrespectful. It disregards your autonomy and your ability to make decisions for yourself.

A healthy relationship involves respect for each other’s boundaries and freedom. Anyone trying excessively to control your life is a clear sign of toxicity.

9) They refuse to change

Ultimately, the most significant sign of a genuinely toxic person is their refusal to change.

Despite numerous confrontations and discussions about their toxic behavior, they fail to acknowledge their shortcomings and make necessary changes.

We all have the capacity for growth and change. However, if someone continuously chooses toxicity over self-improvement, it’s a clear sign they’re genuinely toxic.

You cannot force someone to change. They have to want it for themselves. It’s okay to walk away from relationships that harm your mental and emotional wellbeing. You deserve peace and positivity in your life.

Final thought: The power is within you

As we delve into the world of psychology, we realize that our interactions with others form a significant part of our lives. Yet, it’s crucial to remember that we have control over who we allow into our personal space.

The psychologist and Holocaust survivor, Viktor Frankl, once said, “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”

Dealing with toxic individuals can be challenging, and at times, emotionally draining. But we have the power to choose how we respond to these situations. We can set boundaries, seek help when needed, and most importantly, prioritize our mental health.

Recognizing the signs of a toxic person is the first step towards self-protection. But remember, it’s okay to walk away from relationships that cause you harm.

To further empower yourself in these situations, consider reading my book, Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego.

This book offers practical insights and mindfulness techniques that can help you stay grounded and resilient in the face of negativity.

You have the power to choose your own way. You deserve peace, respect, and genuine connections. You are stronger than you think.