8 signs you’re dealing with a female narcissist, according to psychology

Navigating relationships can be tricky, especially when you suspect you’re dealing with a narcissist. Even trickier? When that narcissist is a woman.

Psychology gives us useful tools to identify the signs of a female narcissist, and knowing these signs can save you a lot of emotional distress.

In this article, I’ll share with you the 8 tell-tale signs that you’re dealing with a female narcissist, backed by psychological research. Knowledge is power, after all.

Let’s dive in.

1) The spotlight is always on them

In the world of psychology, narcissism is characterized by an inflated sense of self-importance and a deep need for admiration.

Female narcissists, specifically, have a knack for making every situation about them. They crave the spotlight and will do anything to keep it shining brightly on them.

Whether it’s a conversation, an event, or even someone else’s accomplishment, a female narcissist has the ability to turn the focus back onto herself. It’s as if they’re the center of their own universe and expect everyone else to orbit around them.

This constant need for attention and validation is more than just annoying or frustrating; it’s a clear sign of narcissism. 

2) Lack of empathy

Empathy, the ability to understand and share the feelings of others, is a trait that narcissists often lack. In my own personal experience, this was a clear sign that I was dealing with a female narcissist.

I recall a time when I was going through a rough patch – I had just lost my job and was dealing with the emotional toll of it all. During this time, I had a friend who constantly shifted the conversation back to her own problems whenever I tried to talk about what I was going through.

Instead of offering comfort or understanding, she would often dismiss my feelings, comparing them to her own ‘bigger’ problems. This lack of empathy, this inability to step outside her own world and into mine, was a telltale sign of narcissism.

If you find yourself in a similar situation where your feelings are being disregarded for the sake of another person’s ego, you might be dealing with a female narcissist.

3) Exploitative behavior

Narcissists are known to exploit others to achieve their goals. This means they will use people in their lives as stepping stones to get where they want to be, often without any regard for the feelings or well-being of those they’re using.

Narcissists are more likely to engage in exploitative behavior, such as taking advantage of others or using them for personal gain.

If you find that you’re being used as a means to an end rather than being valued for who you are, it could be a sign that you’re dealing with a female narcissist. It’s important to remember that everyone deserves respect and consideration. A relationship that lacks these elements might be a red flag.

4) Overly competitive

Healthy competition can be a driving force for personal growth and development. However, when it becomes excessive and unhealthy, it could be a sign of a narcissist.

Female narcissists are often overly competitive. They feel the need to always be the best and will go to great lengths to outshine everyone else. This isn’t limited to just career or academic achievements; it can extend to every aspect of life, from looks to social status and beyond.

If you notice that someone in your life is constantly trying to one-up you or others around them, it might be more than just a competitive spirit. This could be a sign of narcissism. As always, it’s essential to recognize these signs within the context of their overall behavior.

5) Extreme sensitivity to criticism

No one likes being criticized, but for a narcissist, even the slightest hint of criticism can be unbearable.

Female narcissists often have an inflated sense of self and believe they are superior. So, when faced with criticism, they may react with extreme defensiveness or even hostility.

It can be heart-wrenching to see someone you care about unable to accept constructive feedback, lashing out or shutting down instead. This extreme sensitivity to criticism is not just about protecting their ego, but it’s also a defense mechanism to maintain their disproportionate sense of self-worth.

If you find yourself walking on eggshells around someone for fear of how they might react to even the smallest critique, you could be dealing with a female narcissist. Remember, everyone deserves to express their feelings in a safe and respectful environment.

6) A sense of entitlement

One of the most glaring signs of a narcissist is an undeniable sense of entitlement. They believe that they are inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment.

I remember a time when I was planning a party. I had a friend who assumed she would be the guest of honor, purely based on the fact that she was close to me. She expected special treatment, from her seating arrangement to the type of food served.

What struck me was not just the expectations but the lack of consideration for other guests. This sense of entitlement, with little regard for others, can be a clear sign of narcissism.

If you encounter someone in your life with similar behavior, you might be dealing with a female narcissist. It’s essential to bear in mind that mutual respect is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship.

7) Frequent lies and exaggerations

A common trait of narcissists is their tendency to lie and exaggerate to maintain their self-image and manipulate others.

Female narcissists, in particular, may often bend the truth or overstate their accomplishments to appear more impressive or important. These fabrications can range from minor exaggerations to outright lies.

It’s disconcerting when you realize that someone you trust is regularly being dishonest. If you notice a pattern of frequent lies or exaggerations, it could be a sign that you’re dealing with a female narcissist.

Honesty is the foundation of any relationship, and consistent dishonesty should not be overlooked.

8) Lack of boundaries

The concept of personal boundaries is often lost on narcissists. They may invade your personal space, disregard your feelings, or feel entitled to your time and resources.

This lack of respect for boundaries can be draining and damaging. If you feel like your personal space and feelings are not being respected consistently, it’s a strong sign that you’re dealing with a female narcissist.

Understanding and respecting boundaries is crucial in any relationship. If these are being violated, it’s important to address the issue head-on and consider seeking professional help if needed.

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Tina Fey

I'm Tina Fey, the founder of the blog Love Connection. I've extremely passionate about sharing relationship advice. I've studied psychology and have my Masters in marital, family, and relationship counseling. I hope with all my heart to help you improve your relationships, and I hope that even if one thing I write helps you, it means more to me than just about anything else in the world. Check out my blog Love Connection, and if you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Twitter

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