Wake-up calls in life can be brutal. They often come at times when we least expect them, and more often than not, a little too late.
Hello, I’m Lachlan Brown, founder of Hack Spirit and a devoted mindfulness enthusiast. I’ve had my fair share of wake-up calls, and I’ve seen others go through the same.
In this article, I’m going to talk about eight brutal wake-up calls we often receive later than we should. These are lessons that can change our lives if we just pay attention early enough.
Think of it as a toolkit for life. A guide to help you navigate the curveballs life throws at you before it’s too late.
Let’s dive in.
1. Realizing you’re not the center of the universe
It’s a bit of a shock when we first realize that the world doesn’t revolve around us. And sadly, for some of us, this realization comes a lot later than it should.
We grow up thinking we’re the lead character in our own story, oblivious to the fact that everyone else is living their own story too. They aren’t just supporting characters in ours.
This wake-up call can be brutal, but it’s crucial for our personal development and for building healthy relationships. Understanding that we’re just a tiny part of this vast universe can help us be more empathetic, patient, and kind.
This shift in perspective brings us back down to earth. It reminds us that we’re not entitled to anything and that we need to work for what we want in life.
As renowned psychologist Carl Rogers once said, “The only person who is educated is the one who has learned how to learn and change.”
Recognizing that you’re not the center of the universe is a big step towards this kind of self-growth.
2. Recognizing that time waits for no one
I still remember when I turned 30. It felt as if I had woken up from a long sleep and suddenly realized how fast time was passing by.
In our youth, it’s easy to feel like we have an endless supply of time. We make plans for the future, confident that we have all the time in the world to achieve our dreams. But as we grow older, the truth becomes clear: time waits for no one.
It’s a brutal wake-up call, but it’s also a necessary one.
One day, I looked at my list of goals and realized that I hadn’t made much progress on any of them. That’s when it hit me – I was taking time for granted.
Since then, I have learned to value each moment and make the most of it. Because in the end, we’re not guaranteed tomorrow – all we have is today. So don’t put off what you can do today for tomorrow.
As Benjamin Franklin wisely said, “You may delay, but time will not.”
3. Understanding that happiness comes from within
In today’s world, it’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that material possessions will bring us happiness. We chase after the latest gadgets, the biggest houses, the fanciest cars, only to find that the joy they bring is fleeting.
This brutal wake-up call often comes too late in life. We spend years accumulating stuff, only to realize that true happiness doesn’t come from external possessions, but from within.
In my book, Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego, I discuss this concept in depth. I delve into the teachings of Buddhism that emphasize inner peace and contentment over materialistic pursuits.
The truth is, we carry the key to our own happiness. It’s about finding contentment in who we are and what we have. It’s about loving ourselves and being grateful for the simple things in life.
4. Learning to embrace failure
The fear of failure holds many of us back from reaching our full potential. We might hesitate to take risks or step out of our comfort zone, thinking that failure is the worst possible outcome.
But here’s a brutal wake-up call: Failure is not the enemy. In fact, it’s one of our greatest teachers.
Psychological research has shown that experiencing failure can actually improve our problem-solving skills, build resilience, and foster growth mindset. Failure forces us to confront our weaknesses, reassess our strategies, and come up with innovative solutions.
Rather than avoiding failure, we should learn to embrace it. Each failed attempt is a step towards success – it means you’re trying, you’re learning, and you’re growing.
As Thomas Edison famously said after numerous failed attempts to invent the light bulb, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” His approach to failure was not as a setback, but as an opportunity for growth and learning. This is a mindset we should all strive to adopt.
5. Accepting that not everyone will like you
Here’s a counter-intuitive wake-up call: You don’t need everyone to like you. In fact, it’s impossible to be liked by everyone, and that’s okay.
Many of us spend a lot of time and energy trying to please everyone around us, often at the expense of our own happiness and well-being. We fear rejection and criticism so much that we end up losing our authenticity.
But the truth is, no matter how kind, generous or friendly you are, there will always be people who don’t like you. And that’s perfectly fine.
It’s more important to be true to yourself and maintain your self-respect than to conform to others’ expectations just for the sake of being liked.
As Dr. Seuss wisely said, “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”
This wake-up call may initially seem brutal, but it can ultimately lead to a life of authenticity and self-acceptance.
6. Recognizing that change is inevitable
Change can be scary. We often resist it, clinging to what’s familiar, even when it’s not serving us well. But here’s a wake-up call: change is not only inevitable, it’s necessary for growth.
Life is a series of changes – some big, some small. These changes push us out of our comfort zones and challenge us to adapt and grow.
Instead of resisting change, we should learn to embrace it. It’s through change that we learn, evolve, and become better versions of ourselves.
As famed psychologist Carl Jung once said, “We cannot change anything until we accept it. Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses.”
Accepting that change is a part of life can free us from fear and open us up to new possibilities.
7. Realizing that perfection is a myth
Perfection is a concept that can be incredibly damaging. We often strive for it in all areas of life, from our careers to our relationships to our personal accomplishments. However, the pursuit of perfection often leads to stress, dissatisfaction, and self-criticism.
The reality is that no one is perfect. We all have flaws and make mistakes. And that’s okay. It’s these imperfections that make us human.
Once, in an attempt to be perfect, a project was rushed to meet a deadline. The result was a product full of errors and bugs that took weeks to fix. It was a stark reminder that striving for perfection can actually lead to more mistakes.
Remember, it’s okay to strive for excellence and improvement. But don’t let the pursuit of perfection hinder your progress or rob you of joy.
8. Discovering that self-care is not selfish
We often put the needs of others before our own, believing that taking time for ourselves is selfish. However, this mindset can lead to burnout and emotional exhaustion.
The truth is, self-care is not selfish; it’s necessary. Just like how flight attendants instruct us to put on our own oxygen mask before assisting others, we need to take care of ourselves before we can effectively care for others.
Self-care can take many forms, from taking a day off to rest, practicing mindfulness, engaging in a hobby, or simply saying no when you’re overwhelmed. By taking care of our own physical and emotional needs, we can be more present and effective in helping others.
This wake-up call might seem brutal at first, but it’s an essential lesson for maintaining our mental and physical health.
Final thoughts: Embrace the journey
Life is a journey filled with ups and downs, twists and turns, opportunities and challenges. These eight wake-up calls are not meant to scare you, but to serve as reminders to make the most of your journey.
Every wake-up call, brutal as it may be, is an opportunity for growth and self-improvement. We often learn more from our failures than our successes, and it’s through these tough lessons that we become stronger and wiser.
In my book Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego, I delve deeper into how we can shift our perspective to view life’s challenges as opportunities for growth rather than obstacles.
Remember, it’s never too late to change. It’s never too late to grow. Whether you’re dealing with the harsh realization that you’re not the center of the universe or grappling with the concept of imperfection, remember that every step you take brings you closer to becoming the best version of yourself.
As we navigate through life’s journey, let these wake-up calls serve as guideposts, reminding us to live authentically, embrace change, value time, and most importantly, take care of ourselves.
In the words of Maya Angelou, “We may encounter many defeats but we must not be defeated.” Embrace the journey, because every experience along the way is a step towards becoming who you’re truly meant to be.
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