7 types of people you need to get out of your life, according to psychology

Life is a constant game of picking and choosing who we allow to stay in our personal space. Each person we interact with has the potential to either elevate us or bring us down.

It’s Lachlan Brown here, and as the founder of Hack Spirit, I’ve realized over the years that there are certain types of people who can significantly influence our emotional and mental well-being.

Psychology too, tells us that our company matters. It affects not just our happiness and productivity, but also our outlook towards life.

So, in this article, I’m going to share with you seven types of people you might need to reconsider having in your life. It’s not about being unkind or insensitive, but about understanding your worth and setting boundaries for your own peace of mind.

Remember, it’s your life. Choose wisely who gets to be a part of it.

1) The constant critic

There’s a fine line between constructive criticism and constant criticism. And according to psychology, the latter can be damaging to our mental health.

We all have that one person in our lives who doesn’t miss an opportunity to point out our flaws. It could be a friend, a family member, or even a colleague. They make it their mission to highlight our mistakes without any intention of helping us grow.

Understand this: the persistent critic isn’t guiding you towards improvement. Instead, they’re chipping away at your self-esteem, leaving you feeling inadequate and insecure.

It’s important for us to surround ourselves with people who genuinely want us to improve and grow. People who guide us, not belittle us.

So if you have a constant critic in your life, it might be time to reconsider their place in your journey.

2) The energy vampire

As an expert in Buddhism, I’ve learned that everything in life is energy, and this includes our relationships.

In Buddhism, we talk about maintaining a positive state of mind, something that’s difficult to do when you have an “energy vampire” in your life. This person is someone who constantly drains your emotional energy, leaving you feeling exhausted and depleted.

They’re often negative, always complaining, and seem to thrive on creating chaos and drama. Being around them feels like being sucked into a black hole of negativity where positivity can’t survive.

Protecting your mental energy is crucial for maintaining a balanced and happy life. It’s about finding inner peace and harmony, and an energy vampire hinders that journey.

If you identify such a person in your life, it might be time to distance yourself for your own emotional and mental well-being.

3) The perpetual victim

We all face difficulties and hardships, but there’s a certain type of person who always seems to be surrounded by drama and misfortune. They are the perpetual victims, and they can be incredibly draining.

Through my experiences running Hack Spirit, I’ve noticed how some individuals refuse to take responsibility for their actions and instead blame others for their problems.

These perpetual victims are always seeking sympathy and rarely make any effort to change their circumstances. They dwell on their problems and seem to enjoy wallowing in their misery.

Having these individuals in your life can be emotionally taxing, as they often demand constant attention and support but give nothing in return.

It’s important to show empathy and support those in need, but if someone continuously plays the victim card without making any efforts to change, it might be time to reconsider their place in your life.

4) The narcissist

In Buddhism, a key principle is the idea of interconnectedness—that we are all part of a larger whole and our actions impact others. This principle is often lost on the narcissist.

Narcissists are self-absorbed, always seeking attention and admiration. They lack empathy, disregarding others’ feelings and needs. Their world revolves around themselves and they often manipulate others to maintain their inflated sense of self.

Navigating a relationship with a narcissist can be tricky, and it’s almost impossible to have a balanced, reciprocal relationship with them.

In my book, Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego, I delve into the Buddhist philosophy of interconnectedness and how fostering empathy and compassion can lead to more meaningful relationships.

However, with narcissists, it’s a constant battle. They are resistant to change because they do not see their actions as harmful.

If you have a narcissist in your life, remember your own worth. You deserve relationships that are balanced and respectful, ones that acknowledge the interconnectedness of life.

5) The non-listener

One of the most essential principles in Buddhism is mindfulness, which includes being fully present and engaged during conversations. This is something that the non-listener fails to do.

Non-listeners are those who don’t really listen when you talk. They may hear you, but they’re not genuinely interested or engaged in what you’re saying. They’re always ready with their own stories, barely giving you a chance to express yourself.

These individuals fail in practicing mindful listening—a key element of effective communication and deep understanding in Buddhism. Conversations with them can feel one-sided and unfulfilling, leaving you feeling unheard and undervalued.

If you have a non-listener in your life, it might be time to seek out people who respect the give-and-take of a good conversation. Remember, your thoughts and feelings are valid and deserve to be heard.

6) The chronic pessimist

Life’s too short to be surrounded by negativity, something I’ve learned firsthand. As creatives and entrepreneurs, we often encounter roadblocks and challenges. It’s part of the journey. But the last thing we need is a chronic pessimist by our side.

Chronic pessimists are those who always see the glass as half empty. They focus on the negative aspects of life and often expect the worst outcomes. Their constant pessimism can be draining, bringing down your mood and dampening your spirit.

While it’s important to be realistic and not ignore the negative aspects of life, there’s a difference between being realistic and being perpetually negative.

If you have a chronic pessimist in your life, it might be time to distance yourself. Surround yourself with people who can offer both support and constructive criticism, not constant negativity. After all, positivity breeds positivity.

7) The self-centered individual

In Buddhism, the principle of ‘Anatta’ or ‘no-self’ teaches us to step away from selfishness and to embrace compassion and empathy towards others. However, the self-centered individual seems to struggle with this concept.

Self-centered individuals are always focused on their own needs, thoughts, and feelings, often at the expense of others. They lack empathy and have a hard time seeing things from another person’s perspective.

Engaging with such individuals can be emotionally draining as they rarely show interest or concern in what’s happening in your life. Their conversations revolve around themselves, giving little room for mutual exchange.

If you have a self-centered individual in your life, it might be time to distance yourself. Remember, true relationships are built on mutual respect, understanding, and empathy — principles that are at the heart of Buddhist teachings.

Final thoughts

In conclusion, the people we surround ourselves with significantly impact our emotional and mental well-being. It’s essential to evaluate our relationships and ensure they’re nurturing our growth, not hindering it.

Remember, it’s not about cutting people off without a second thought, but understanding your worth and setting boundaries for your own peace of mind.

If you’re interested in learning more about how Buddhist principles can help you navigate your relationships and personal growth, I invite you to check out my book Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego.

Here’s to fostering healthy relationships that inspire growth and positivity. Remember, your journey is unique, so make sure it’s filled with people who enrich it, not deplete it.