5 things that truly make you happy, according to psychology

Happiness is a concept we all aspire to understand and cultivate. After years of researching psychology, self-improvement, and mindfulness, I’ve come to realize that genuine happiness isn’t about chasing momentary thrills. It’s more often connected to how we engage with our daily routines, the strength of our relationships, and the sense of purpose that guides our actions.

My work at Hack Spirit typically explores mindfulness and personal growth, while Small Business Bonfire delves into entrepreneurship and resilience.

Across both platforms, the core elements that nurture happiness remain consistent—and they’re more accessible than many people think.

Below, I’ll explore five fundamental factors that psychology shows can truly enhance our well-being. I’ll share not only the research behind these concepts but also how they’ve played out in my own life, in the hope that you’ll find actionable insights for your own journey.

These aren’t quick fixes or magic bullets; they are steady foundations for a deeply fulfilling life.

1. Deep, Authentic Relationships

Psychological research consistently points to high-quality relationships as one of the most reliable predictors of long-term happiness.

A prime example is the well-known Harvard Study of Adult Development, which has followed participants for decades and found that those with strong social connections tend to live longer, healthier, and happier lives.

Having people in your corner—whether they’re close friends, family members, or supportive colleagues—can offset stress and add significant meaning to everyday experiences.

When I think back to some of my happiest moments, they often involve the people who’ve shared the journey with me.

In the early days of building Hack Spirit, the challenges sometimes felt overwhelming. I had endless writing to do, technical hurdles to solve, and a myriad of small tasks that kept piling up.

Yet, because I had a few supportive friends who believed in my mission, the tough moments felt less burdensome. Their encouragement turned late-night brainstorming sessions into energizing get-togethers.

Over time, I began to see that authentic connections provide more than just companionship—they also offer a sense of emotional grounding.

True authenticity in friendships and family ties requires vulnerability, but in embracing that vulnerability, we open ourselves to richer bonds.

Ultimately, the trust and affection that come from these bonds act like a buffer against life’s uncertainties, making us more resilient and more content overall.

2. Engaging Activities (Flow States)

One of the most intriguing concepts in positive psychology is the idea of “flow,” popularized by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi.

Flow describes the experience of being so absorbed in a task that you lose awareness of time and external distractions.

You might be writing, coding, painting, or playing a musical instrument—any activity that challenges you enough to keep you interested but doesn’t overwhelm you. The state of flow effectively silences nagging worries or internal doubts, immersing you in a calm, energized focus.

I often encounter flow when I’m deeply involved in writing, whether it’s for Hack Spirit or Small Business Bonfire.

Hours can slip by as I sift through research, shape my arguments, and polish my prose.

This sense of immersion is not only productive but also deeply satisfying. It reminds me that happiness can stem from the sheer pleasure of being fully present in something that stretches our skills.

Psychological studies indicate that individuals who frequently experience flow tend to report higher levels of life satisfaction.

By regularly engaging in tasks that push you into this zone, you’re effectively training your brain to concentrate more fully and worry less.

It’s a built-in mindfulness exercise—every time you immerse yourself in a challenging yet rewarding activity, you’re practicing being in the moment.

This not only boosts happiness but also contributes to personal growth over time.

3. Meaning and Purpose in Life

Happiness often hinges on having a meaningful direction. Martin Seligman, one of the founders of positive psychology, identifies meaning as a core component of well-being in his PERMA model (Positive Emotions, Engagement, Relationships, Meaning, and Achievement).

Meaning involves feeling connected to something larger than yourself—this could be a community project, a creative pursuit, a personal mission, or even a career that aligns with your core values.

When I started Hack Spirit, I did so because I was passionately curious about mindfulness, relationships, and self-improvement. Initially, it was just a personal blog where I shared ideas and tips.

But as I continued, readers began sharing their stories of how an article helped them through a difficult transition or guided them toward a more mindful approach to daily stress.

That’s when it dawned on me that I wasn’t just writing for myself; I was contributing to a broader conversation that was genuinely helping people.

Recognizing that my work had a purpose beyond my personal interests gave it new depth. It kept me motivated through the inevitable bumps in the road—technical challenges, creative blocks, and the everyday scramble of running an online platform.

Psychologists argue that people with a strong sense of purpose often exhibit greater resilience. They can reframe obstacles as challenges to overcome for a higher cause, rather than as insurmountable roadblocks.

Over time, this purposeful mindset fosters a deeper sense of fulfillment. You might see it in an athlete who trains relentlessly to become a role model for young people, or in a social entrepreneur working tirelessly to solve community issues.

Purpose aligns your actions with a vision that enriches not only your life but also the lives of others.

4. Mindfulness and Self-Compassion

Mindfulness and self-compassion are intertwined practices that shape how we view ourselves and respond to life’s ups and downs.

Mindfulness involves paying non-judgmental attention to the present moment, observing your thoughts and feelings without letting them dominate you.

Self-compassion, researched extensively by psychologist Kristin Neff, is about showing yourself the same kindness and understanding you’d typically show a friend.

Carl Rogers, a towering figure in humanistic psychology, once remarked, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”

This quote captures the essence of self-compassion.

Real change seldom results from harsh self-criticism. Instead, it thrives in an environment where you acknowledge your imperfections yet remain open to learning.

Mindfulness is the tool that allows you to step back from negative internal chatter and see your thought patterns for what they are—just thoughts, not absolute truths.

5. Acts of Kindness and Contribution

A growing body of research suggests that kindness is a potent catalyst for happiness. Studies indicate that individuals who spend money on others rather than themselves experience a higher level of happiness.

This phenomenon is commonly referred to as the “helper’s high,” stemming from the dopamine boost your brain receives when you do something beneficial for another person.

Contributing to the well-being of others can take many forms. It might be volunteering for a local charity, supporting a friend in need, or mentoring someone in your field.

Whenever I take the time to help an up-and-coming entrepreneur navigate a tricky phase, I’m reminded of how uplifting it feels to share knowledge, resources, and encouragement.

It reinforces the idea that happiness isn’t isolated within us; it’s a social phenomenon tied to how we interact with and uplift one another.

Acts of kindness generate a ripple effect. The person on the receiving end feels supported, which can instill a desire to “pay it forward” to someone else.

That cycle of goodwill not only cultivates happiness on an individual level but also nurtures a more positive community.

In this sense, your personal joy becomes interconnected with the collective well-being of the people around you.

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Lachlan Brown

I’m Lachlan Brown, the founder, and editor of Hack Spirit. I love writing practical articles that help others live a mindful and better life. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and I’ve spent the last 15 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. Check out my latest book on the Hidden Secrets of Buddhism and How it Saved My Life. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook or Twitter.

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