Have you ever thought that people act a little different around you? Like they don’t say what they really want to say to you?
Despite what you probably think, it doesn’t mean they dislike you.
In fact, underneath it all, they admire you.
The problem? Your personality is too real, and it’s intimidating them.
They just can’t deal with your ability to think for yourself and ignore stereotypes.
If you think this sounds like you, you might identify with these traits.
1) You say what you mean and mean what you say
So many people are afraid to speak their mind because they don’t want to be criticized.
They don’t want to be seen as “weird” for thinking differently than everyone else.
But you’re not like this.
You have to express what you’re feeling because it would be inauthentic not to. It would be superficial, and in your mind, nothing good ever comes from superficial communication.
You know that if you’re going to develop meaningful connections with others and make a positive impact in life, then you have to ignore the naysayers and express yourself fully. It’s the only way.
2) You don’t depend on others for your happiness
We’ve all been there. You know, the relationship that consumes your whole being and then when it’s all over, you feel utterly traumatized.
But this was a learning lesson you didn’t take for granted. It made you realize that the only way forward is being happy with who you are, whether you’re single or in a relationship.
You love having authentic relationships, but you also know that it’s your responsibility to look after yourself.
As Buddha said:
“No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.”
3) You don’t judge people
When you’re comfortable with who you are, there’s no need to judge other people to make yourself feel better.
You find it much more satisfying to be curious. You know there’s much more to a person than how they look or even how they talk.
We all go through shit in our lives, and you know that nothing is ever black and white.
You prefer to focus on the good in other people and live your life free of toxic energy.
4) You love hanging out with people who have unique characteristics
Society has a way of stereotyping everyone into a small box that can be difficult to escape from.
This can make people act like robots, which can get really tiring and boring to deal with.
This is why you love spending time with people who have unique characteristics. It’s refreshing, it’s real and it makes life fun.
You also find it easier to make meaningful connections with these types of people. As they’ve escaped from the limiting chains of society’s stereotypes, they’re more willing to express themselves honestly.
Seeing as you do the same, this can ignite a special connection that expands your mind and makes you more hopeful in humanity.
5) You can’t stand small talk
It’s not so much the boring questions that annoy you. It’s the routine, superficial answers that irk you to your core.
When someone says “I’m good”, it lacks so much meaning that it really shouldn’t be said.
This is why you stay way from small-talk. For you, it only serves to reinforce the robotic robots that most people have become.
You want to know how someone is really doing. You want them to be honest, to express themselves, and not care about other people judging them.
You want to know the purpose behind someone’s actions and what they really find joyful in life.
These are the kinds of conversations that get your juices flowing.
6) Action is what matters to you
We all know that person that’s a smooth talker. They say all the right things and seem ridiculously articulate, but when it comes down to it, they don’t back it up with action.
This is, even more, the case with the rise of the Internet. You can appear how you want to appear without backing it up with results.
These superficial words can fool most people, but not you.
You know that action is the only thing that matters. You use your critical thinking skills to assess whether someone is the real deal.
You’ve become so good at it that you can smell bullshit from a mile away.
7) You focus on possibilities
We’ve all met those types of people that gossip, talk shit, and focus on the negatives in life. It’s almost like they thrive off toxic energy.
But you can’t see the point in doing this. You prefer to focus on possibilities, opportunities, and positive outcomes.
This is where progress is made. And for you, progress and self-improvement are the keys to living well.
Because if you’re not growing, then you’re not really living.
8) People say you have a “refreshing personality”
Have you been told that you have a “refreshing personality?”
This is common for someone with a unique personality that most people don’t encounter often.
And don’t worry, it’s a good thing.
It means they enjoy hanging around someone who is different and dances to the beat of their own drum.
After all, you don’t give politically correct answers. You don’t do things to fit into society’s thin definition of normal.
You’re honest with who you are and you don’t shy away from sharing your opinions.
This is refreshing for a lot of people because they don’t come across this type of person very often.
When someone has the ability to tell things how they really are without being influenced by preconceived ideas, it is very inspiring, unique, and refreshing for the people around them.
9) You know where you’re going in life
We’ve all met someone who doesn’t really know what they’re doing with their life. They move from one idea to the next never really getting anything done.
While it’s fine to be like this for a period of time in anyone’s life, there comes a time where you need to know who you are and what you want to move forward in life.
And this is exactly what you’ve done.
You’ve taken the time to get to know yourself and what you truly desire, and now you have total clarity on what you want your life to look like.
You’re ultra-focused on achieving your goals to get it done, as well.
Whether it’s enhancing your state of mind, your peace, or your relationships with other people, you set the goal because you know what will make you happy.
Most importantly, you make sure you achieve it.
10) You don’t worry needlessly
Look, I think we all know that worrying is a rather useless endeavor. The Dalai Lama says that perfectly above.
Because of your wisdom beyond your years, you’ve known this for a long time, and most importantly, you’ve focused on reducing your worrying as you know it doesn’t serve a purpose.
You direct your attention to the present moment and what can actually be controlled. This is another refreshing aspect of your personality that people love about you.
In the end, what makes a person real?
It’s pretty clear that if you possess most of the traits above, then you have an authentic and “real personality.”
But you may be asking, what does that mean?
Being real isn’t just about being honest with your opinion.
It’s about being honest with yourself.
It’s about understanding what you’re feeling and being able to communicate those feelings with others.
It’s about pausing, stopping, and checking in with yourself to truly know what it is you’re thinking and feeling.
It’s not about reacting angrily and “expressing your opinion”. Nope, because oftentimes that’s not your real opinion. It’s just a toxic emotion taking control of you.
When you’re able to take a step back and observe yourself and how you’re reacting, you’re better able to understand yourself and express what you’re really thinking.
This ability to be mindful of your emotions also makes you kinder as well.
Human hearts are naturally tender and when you know yourself you don’t become defensive in any way.
You just want to help others, and what people think about you just doesn’t matter.
Lost Your Sense of Purpose?
In this age of information overload and pressure to meet others’ expectations, many struggle to connect with their core purpose and values. It’s easy to lose your inner compass.
Jeanette Brown created this free values discovery PDF to help clarify your deepest motivations and beliefs. As an experienced life coach and self-improvement teacher, Jeanette guides people through major transitions by realigning them with their principles.
Her uniquely insightful values exercises will illuminate what inspires you, what you stand for, and how you aim to operate. This serves as a refreshing filter to tune out societal noise so you can make choices rooted in what matters most to you.
With your values clearly anchored, you’ll gain direction, motivation and the compass to navigate decisions from your best self – rather than fleeting emotion or outside influences.
Stop drifting without purpose. Rediscover what makes you come alive with Jeanette Brown’s values clarity guide.
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