10 ways to be alone without feeling lonely

Ever find yourself with a lot of alone time and no idea how to deal with it without feeling lonely? You’re not the only one.

Maybe it’s by choice, or perhaps it’s just how the cookie crumbles. Either way, it isn’t always easy to be alone without feeling that nagging sense of loneliness.

Believe it or not, being alone doesn’t have to equal feeling lonely. In fact, it can be a good way to get to know yourself better.

This article is all about helping you enjoy your own company and not feel so lonely when you’re by yourself.

You’re about to discover a whole new way of enjoying your own company!


1. Embrace the silence

It might sound strange, but the first step to enjoying your alone time is simply to accept and embrace it. Sounds easy? But you’d be surprised how often we try to fill our silence with noise – turning on the TV, scrolling through social media, or even just daydreaming about being somewhere else.

Instead of running from the quiet, try to lean into it. Use this time to connect with your thoughts and feelings. You could meditate, journal, or just sit and soak in the peace and quiet. You might find that silence isn’t as scary as you thought!

Remember, it’s okay to be alone with your thoughts. In fact, it can be a great way to get to know yourself better. So next time you find yourself alone, instead of reaching for your phone or remote control, try embracing the silence. You might be surprised at how refreshing it can be!


2. Discover a new hobby

Who said being alone had to be boring? When you find yourself with some alone time, seize this golden opportunity to pick up a new hobby or dive deeper into an old one.

Remember that pottery class you always wanted to take? Or maybe you’ve always wanted to try your hand at writing poetry or painting? Well, now is the perfect time!

Engaging in a hobby not only keeps your mind active but also gives you a sense of accomplishment. Plus, it’s fun and can be incredibly therapeutic. So go ahead, start that DIY project, plant a mini indoor garden, learn a new language – the possibilities are endless.

The key here is to engage in something you genuinely enjoy and lose yourself in it. Before you know it, you’ll be looking forward to your alone time as ‘hobby time’. So say goodbye to loneliness and hello to creativity!


3. Stay active

Now, hear me out. I used to be the kind of person who would roll their eyes whenever someone suggested exercise as a solution to anything. But trust me, staying active is a game-changer when it comes to being alone without feeling lonely.

A few years back, I found myself feeling pretty lonely. I wasn’t really into the idea of hitting the gym or going for a run, so I decided to take up dancing. Every time I found myself feeling lonely, I’d blast some music and just dance around my living room.

Not only was it a great way to get moving (and an excellent stress reliever), but it also made me feel connected to something larger – the rhythm of the music, the flow of the dance moves. It was just me, my music, and my wayward (but enthusiastic!) dance moves.

So whether it’s dancing, yoga, walking, or even just stretching – find some form of physical activity that you enjoy. It doesn’t have to be strenuous or challenging; it just needs to get you moving and make you feel good. Trust me, your mind (and your body) will thank you for it!

4. Connect with nature

Did you know that spending time in nature can significantly reduce feelings of stress, anxiety, and loneliness? In fact, a study from Stanford University found that walking in nature can decrease rumination, a type of self-focused repetitive thought that often coincides with feelings of loneliness.

Whether it’s a walk in the park, tending to a houseplant, or just sitting in your backyard, connecting with nature can provide a sense of calm and tranquillity that’s hard to find elsewhere.

Nature doesn’t judge or expect anything from us. It just exists in all its glory, offering us a chance to step away from our usual surroundings and breathe in some fresh air. So next time you’re feeling lonely, try spending some time with Mother Nature. Her company is pretty great!


5. Practice self-care and self-love

This is a big one. When we’re alone, it can be all too easy to forget to look after ourselves. But practicing self-care and self-love is crucial for warding off feelings of loneliness.

Self-care isn’t just about bubble baths and face masks (though those are great too!). It’s about taking time out of your day to do something that nourishes you – body, mind, and soul. Maybe it’s curling up with a good book, cooking a meal just for you, or even just taking a few moments to breathe deeply and relax.

But self-care goes hand in hand with self-love. Being alone gives us a chance to reflect on who we are, what we want, and how we treat ourselves. Use this time to practice kindness towards yourself. Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small. Forgive yourself for your mistakes. Recognize your worth.

Remember, you’re not alone because no one wants to be with you. You’re alone because you are enough on your own. Embrace that, love yourself for it, and watch as loneliness fades away. After all, when you love yourself, you are never truly alone.


6. Stay connected

Now, this may sound counterintuitive. After all, we’re talking about being alone.  But staying connected with others has been my secret weapon in combating loneliness during my alone time.

A few years ago, I moved to a new city. It was exciting but also very lonely. I didn’t know anyone, and the isolation hit me hard. One day, I decided to pick up the phone and call an old friend. We ended up talking for hours, reminiscing about old times and catching up on new ones.

After that call, I felt lighter and less alone. It made me realize that physical alone time doesn’t mean you can’t stay connected with others. You can call or video chat with friends and family. Even sending a quick text or email can remind you that you’re part of a broader network of people who care about you.

So yes, relish your alone time but remember it’s okay (and important) to reach out to others sometimes. Trust me; it makes a world of difference!


7.  Acknowledge your emotions

Sometimes, being alone can suck. It can feel isolating, scary, and yes, incredibly lonely. And you know what? That’s okay.

We’re often told to put on a brave face, to find the silver lining in every situation. But sometimes, what we really need is to let ourselves feel whatever it is we’re feeling.

Feeling lonely doesn’t make you weak or pathetic. It makes you human. We all feel it from time to time. So if you’re feeling lonely, let yourself feel it. Acknowledge it. Sit with it.

It’s only by acknowledging our feelings that we can begin to understand them and, eventually, move past them. So don’t be afraid of your emotions. They’re not your enemy; they’re a part of you. And dealing with them honestly is a vital step towards not just being alone without feeling lonely, but also understanding and accepting yourself better.

Remember, it’s okay not to be okay all the time. You’re human, and that’s more than okay.


8. Learn something new

Did you know that learning something new can boost your brain health and even your self-esteem? According to a study published in The Journal of Neuropsychiatry and Clinical Neurosciences, learning new skills can improve our cognitive function and increase our feelings of self-efficacy.

Being alone offers the perfect opportunity to learn something new. Always wanted to learn a new language? There’s an app for that. Interested in astronomy? There are countless resources online that can help you get started. Want to master the art of cooking? There are online classes, recipe blogs, and cookbooks galore!

Learning something new not only stimulates your brain but also gives you a sense of accomplishment. Plus, it’s a great conversation starter when you do socialize with others.

So go ahead, seize this opportunity to expand your knowledge and skills. You’ll be surprised at how rewarding it can be!


9. Create a comfortable space

Let me tell you about my sanctuary. It’s a small corner in my living room, with a comfy chair, a little side table for my cup of tea (or coffee, depending on the day), and a shelf filled with my favorite books. This is the place I retreat to when I want to be alone, the place that makes me feel comfortable and safe.

Creating a comfortable space for yourself can make being alone a much more enjoyable experience. It doesn’t have to be an entire room; it can be a corner, like mine, or even just a favorite chair. Fill it with things that make you happy – photos of loved ones, your favorite scented candle, a plush throw blanket.

Having a space like this makes being alone feel less like isolation and more like retreating into your personal haven. So go ahead, create a space that’s just for you. Trust me, it can make all the difference!


10. Don’t fear judgment

Here’s the raw truth: we often feel lonely because we fear judgment from others. We worry that if people knew we were alone, they’d think we were unpopular or unlovable. But let me tell you something important – it’s okay to be alone, and it doesn’t reflect your worth or popularity.

Ignore the societal pressure that equates being alone with being unwanted. Alone time is healthy, necessary, and can be incredibly fulfilling. Don’t let anyone else’s opinion sway your perception of that. You’re not alone because no one wants you; you’re alone because you are learning to enjoy your own company.

Final words

There will be days when the loneliness feels overwhelming, days when you can’t help but wish for company. And that’s okay.

You’re not going to master the art of being alone overnight. It’s a process, and like any process, it has its ups and downs. So cut yourself some slack. Be patient with yourself. Celebrate your progress and don’t beat yourself up over minor setbacks.

Remember, it’s okay to feel lonely sometimes. What matters is that you don’t let that loneliness define you or your experience of being alone.

So there you have it! Being alone isn’t always easy, but with these tips in mind, it can become less about feeling lonely and more about embracing your solitude and enjoying your own company. 

Jeanette Brown

I have been in Education as a teacher, career coach and executive manager over many years.
I'm also an experienced coach who is passionate about supporting people in finding real meaning and purpose in their lives, building a resilient, grounded inner self and achieving their desired goals.

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