Lachlan Brown
Growing as a person isn’t just about getting older, it’s about developing a deeper understanding of oneself and others.
Psychology helps us understand this concept better. It offers clear signs that show we’ve genuinely matured, as opposed to simply aging.
Maturity isn’t easily defined, but it’s deeply felt. It’s about making better choices, learning from experiences, and seeing the world from a broader perspective.
In this article, I’ll share ten signs that psychology suggests indicate true personal maturity.
Let’s get started.
1) Emotional resilience
Life is a roller coaster of emotions, filled with highs and lows. But as we mature, we learn to navigate these emotional waves with resilience.
Emotional resilience is about bouncing back from setbacks and disappointments. It’s about learning from these experiences, rather than letting them overwhelm us.
A sure sign of maturity is when we can face adversity, feel the pain, learn the lesson and then let it go. We don’t waste our energy dwelling on past hurts; instead, we channel it into moving forward.
Psychologist Susan David, renowned for her work on emotional agility quotes, “Life’s beauty is inseparable from its fragility.”
This encapsulates the idea that life is filled with challenges, but it’s our response to those challenges that shows our true maturity.
If you find yourself bouncing back from adversity and using those experiences as fuel for growth, congratulations! You’re demonstrating a key sign of genuine maturity.
2) Empathy
Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others, and it’s a key sign of maturity.
I remember a time when I was so focused on my own world that I didn’t notice the struggles of those around me. But as I’ve matured, I’ve learned to step out of my shoes and into someone else’s.
For instance, when my friend lost her job recently, I didn’t just sympathize with her situation; I genuinely shared in her feelings of loss and uncertainty. This shift in perspective is a clear indication that I’ve grown as a person.
Carl Rogers, one of the most influential psychologists of the 20th century, said, “When someone really hears you without passing judgment on you, without trying to take responsibility for you, without trying to mold you, it feels damn good.”
Empathy is about listening without judgment and understanding without trying to shape or change the person.
If you find yourself truly connecting with others on an emotional level, that’s a sign you’ve genuinely matured.
3) Self-awareness
Self-awareness is an unflinching look in the mirror, acknowledging both our strengths and weaknesses. It’s about knowing who we are at our core, what drives us, and what we need to work on.
There was a time in my life when I was afraid to confront my own shortcomings. But as I’ve matured, I’ve realized that acknowledging my flaws is not a sign of weakness. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. It’s a sign of strength and maturity.
The famous psychologist, Carl Jung, once said, “Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”
If you’re honest with yourself about your strengths and weaknesses and you’re actively working on self-improvement, then that’s a clear sign that you have genuinely matured as a person.
4) Acceptance of change
Change can be scary. It’s a step into the unknown, a disruption of the familiar. But maturity brings with it an acceptance of change, an understanding that life is a series of transitions, each one an opportunity for growth.
I used to resist change, clinging to the comfort of routine and familiarity. But over time, I’ve learned to embrace it. I’ve realized that change isn’t something to be feared; it’s an essential part of life.
Renowned psychologist, William James, said, “The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes.”
This quote speaks volumes about the power we have over our own lives when we shift our perspective towards change.
If you are able to see change not as a threat but as an opportunity for growth and learning, that’s a clear sign you’ve matured.
5) You’ve tamed your ego
The ego is a tricky thing. It has a way of making us feel superior or inferior to others, often leading to unhealthy comparison, judgement, and even conflict. But as we mature, we learn to tame this ego and live with more humility and compassion.
In my journey of understanding Buddhism and mindfulness, one lesson that has truly stuck with me is the importance of living with maximum impact and minimum ego.
This doesn’t mean you have to undermine your self-worth or accomplishments. It’s about understanding that everyone has their own unique path and pace in life. It’s about focusing less on ‘I’ and ‘mine’ and more on ‘we’ and ‘us’.
In my book, , I delve deeper into this concept.
If you’ve noticed that you’ve become less focused on your ego and more focused on the bigger picture of life, consider this a significant sign of your personal maturity.
After all, a truly mature person understands that life is not just about them, but about contributing positively to the world around them.
6) Responsibility
Taking responsibility for our actions is a clear indicator of maturity.
It’s easy to blame circumstances or other people when things go wrong. But the truth is, we have control over our actions and reactions.
As we mature, we understand that it’s not just about taking responsibility for our successes, but also our mistakes. We learn to own up to them and make amends where necessary.
Psychologist Albert Ellis said, “The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.”
If you find yourself owning up to your actions and not shifting blame, that’s a strong sign of genuine maturity.
7) Patience
Patience is a virtue, or so the saying goes. As we mature, we come to understand the truth in this statement.
In my younger years, I was always rushing, always wanting things to happen immediately. But with time, I’ve learned that good things often take time. Patience has taught me to appreciate the journey, not just the destination.
Carl Jung said, “The greatest and most important problems of life are all fundamentally insoluble… They can never be solved but only outgrown.” This quote highlights the importance of patience in our personal growth.
If you find yourself more patient and understanding that some things simply take time, that’s a sign of your maturity.
8) Letting go of grudges
Holding onto grudges is like carrying a heavy burden that weighs you down. As we mature, we realize the importance of letting go of past hurts and moving forward.
I’ve spent years holding onto grudges, allowing past wrongs to taint my present. But over time, I’ve come to understand that forgiveness isn’t just about the other person, it’s about freeing myself from the chains of bitterness.
Forgiving and forgetting are experiences that are original to the point of being unique. They are the stuff of growth and essentially human.
If you find yourself able to forgive and let go, that’s a profound sign of your personal maturity.
9) Valuing experiences over possessions
In a world that often measures success by material wealth, valuing experiences over possessions can seem counterintuitive. But as we mature, we realize that it’s the memories we make and the moments we share that truly enrich our lives.
Psychologist Thomas Gilovich once said, “We buy things to make us happy, and we succeed. But only for a while. New things are exciting to us at first, but then we adapt to them.”
This quote underlines the fleeting happiness that material possessions provide.
If you find yourself valuing experiences and moments over material things, this is a clear sign of your maturity.
10) Authenticity
In a world that often encourages conformity, being true to oneself is a sign of real maturity.
The famous psychologist, Carl Rogers, said, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”
I’ve spent parts of my life trying to fit into molds others had created for me. But as I’ve matured, I’ve learned the value of being authentic, of honoring my unique self and living in alignment with my values.
If you’re living life on your own terms, unapologetically authentic and true to yourself, that’s a clear sign you’ve genuinely matured as a person.
Conclusion
Maturity isn’t about age or experiences alone; it’s about how we learn and grow from these experiences. It’s about our ability to navigate life with grace, resilience, compassion, and mindful presence.
If you’ve found yourself resonating with these signs, give yourself a pat on the back. You’re on the right path. And if not, don’t worry. Maturity is a journey, not a destination.
For those who want to delve deeper into this journey of personal growth and self-discovery, I invite you to explore my book
Here’s to your journey of maturity and mindfulness. Remember, the best is yet to come.
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